We Only Live Once
by ArtBooksMusicFunLove
Summary: Highschool. Senior year. There's a new girl in class and she sits beside Ryoma's seat which turns out to be the beginning of her wonderful coming-of-age story. Follow Alice as she tries to fit in with the SeiGaku crowd and learn that sometimes, falling in love means falling hard and face-flat.
1. Preface

**Author's Note**

**Okay, so hello! This is not a Ryo-Saku story! There I've said it, so you won't expect it anymore.**

**I too am a Ryo-Saku fan but sadly, to make the central point of this story, I needed the protagonist to be someone from someplace else, someone who hadn't known Ryoma as long as the other characters had. Hence, I had to make Alice, my OC. Don't worry though! Because I just love Sakuno she's still a HUGE part of this story. We can't leave her out can we? (*wink wink*)**

**What else do I need to explain?**

**Alice is a girl with light brown hair up to the level of her chest. If you know Yuuya Fukushima of the Love Berrish manga, then she looks like her ('Cause I like girls who look like that – not too innocent and not too wild) only Alice's hair isn't layered like Yuuya's but more or less the same. And, ofcourse, she's cute but not stand-out beautiful. Just adorably cute. And she's the one narrating.**

**This story is set on senior year of highschool at SeiGaku. So,**

**Everyone's taller! Even Ryoma (hurrah!) and the girls look highschool level too, like Sakuno (she still braids her hair though) and Tomo (She doesn't wear the pigtails anymore 'cause she's in highschool and she likes her hair down) even if they only grew a few inches taller. And everyone's more mature too.**

**And yes, this is a lovestory. Expect cheesiness and hopeless romantic-ness. And forgive me for it. (Haha!)**

**If you have more questions, or if there's something I didn't make clear, feel free to ask.**

**Hope ya like it! :))**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the PoT characters, I only wish I did. Especially Ryoma. (*drool*)**

* * *

**Preface**

After years and years of wishing for something great to happen to me, I finally felt like I was getting my wish granted. As I stood there, watching him smile at me, knowing exactly the reason of that smile, under the stars that suddenly seemed brighter than usual in the majestic sky that I have always loved, thinking to myself _'I love him, I love him, I love him'_ over and over, wanting to run to him and not being able to because my feet are frozen still from just seeing him – seeing him there, in front of me.

"I bet you're thinking about how awesome I am." He said, and I laughed.

"I'm right aren't I? I'm right 'cause you laughed! And you laughed 'cause I read your mind right!"

I just kept on laughing, not knowing what to say. Too happy to see him. He walked forward until he was inches from me and I had to look up to see his eyes.

"What _exactly_ are you thinking?" He asked and I liked how he said it in almost a whisper. Like a secret only meant for the two of us.

I couldn't get myself to tell him. I just couldn't. So I decided to show him instead. Some wise man _did _say that actions speak louder than words. So I stood on my toes and kissed him.

After years and years of hoping for something great to happen to me, I finally felt like I was getting my wish granted. Something great _was_ happening - and that something was him.

When I pulled back, I stared at him, smiling. He was smiling too. My favorite crooked smile.

"That," I told him, "is what I was thinking."


	2. Chapter 1: The New Town The Odd Couple

**Author's Note:  
**

**Hello! In this chapter, I tried to introduce who Alice is and how she thinks, acts, and I also tried to show how she built the foundations of her relationships with the SeiGaku characters. Anyway, it's kind of a long chapter. I hope it doesn't bore you. I hope you like it. :)**

**Disclaimer: No, PoT doesn't belong to me. (*sob*) Just this fanfic. :)**

**PS. I am not a fan of Chris Brown but strangely, to inspire me write this story, I have been listening to his song - "Should've Kissed You". Haha! (I'm really fond of that song right now.) And also, a lot of Michael Buble's lately. (*swoon swoon*)**

**Peace and lurve y'all! **

* * *

**Chapter One**

**The New Town. The Odd Couple.**

When I was a little girl, I've had many answers to the question: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'It depended on my mood swings and my current perceptions about things. Like when I took home my first stray puppy and realized how something so cute and innocent can be so fragile, I was sure that I wanted to be a vet when I grew up. But then, I realized how much I can't bear hearing, seeing, or even being close to someone in pain- even if that someone were an animal- and that dream was out the door immediately. And then, I read a book for English class in third grade and I thought about how amazing that book was written, and I was sure that I've found my calling as a writer. But then again, after a year of trying, I realized that the joy for me was in _reading_ the novels, not in writing them, and that dream was chucked out of the window at once. To make the long story short, I wanted to be a lot of things- a lawyer, a female cop, a bartender, an artist, an astronaut - you name it, I've thought about it!

And so, I've tried a lot but never really stuck to one particular thing. Needless to say, on that certain year of highschool, I was lost. While everyone else was prepping up for whatever plans they had for college, I was panicking. Trying to figure out a way to find my passion before term ended. I guess it also goes without saying that I have been part of a lot of clubs, but have never really been part of a certain clique. For instance, as much as I wanted it to be the other way around, I wasn't part of the popular kids which consisted of cheerleaders, jocks, or really beautiful people who didn't have to do anything but be beautiful. I wasn't part of the artsy kids too because the artsy kids on our town, despite of what most people believe to be the best group where you can be your true-awkward-but-amazing-self-but-they'll-accept-a nd-love-you-anyway, tended to be just as judgmental as the popular kids. Oh, you haven't heard of The Beatles? Shame on your bad taste in music. See his painting skills? Why would he even think about picking up a brush? You haven't heard of Niks Mendoza? You've got to be kidding me! Oh, you hate coffee? I guess you're just not one of us. And it goes on and on _and on_ and after a short while of trying to fit in, I grew tired of it. The fact that they were about as superficial as everyone else but was still trying to delude themselves that they weren't was what was puke-inducing for me. I also certainly didn't belong with the nerdy kids because my IQ level is too low for their liking. I was a nobody, in short. A chameleon, changing colors as I go, reflecting only what was surrounding me at the moment.

Before senior year started, my father decided that it was for our family's best interest to move. Business was thriving, he said, and so mom and I packed our suitcases and bid the home I knew for seventeen years goodbye. My dad enrolled me at a school named Seishun Gakuen, which was near our new home. And the truth was that, despite my nervousness, I was really kind of excited. I kept thinking how this was my chance to be an entirely different person. To be someone who scorches the Earth simply with their intensity. To be someone who didn't care about what everybody thought of. I was kind of fed up with my hometown and all the people who've lived there all their life, to be honest. And fed up with myself for being just like them.

That's how I came to sit beside this minor miracle named Ryoma Echizen.

On my first day in class, after the teacher introduced me to everyone and asked them all to be nice to me, I took the vacant seat beside him and said hi to him (because I like to say hi). He looked bored and passive and he was probably still sleepy. He nodded his head in response and that was it. I didn't even get a smile. He went back immediately to looking out of the window. I should've just given up from then on. It probably was my cue to stop talking to him; it was a sign, a helping hand from fate ordering me not to get involved with this person. But oblivious to it all, I again tried to engage him into a conversation.

"I'm Alice Toru." I began. "You are…?"

He stared at me before answering and I felt kind of shy because I always feel kind of shy talking to a stranger.

"Ryoma. Ryoma Echizen."

I nodded. "Okay then, Echizen-san. We're seatmates from now on!" I beamed.

"Hurrah." He says weakly. His lack of enthusiasm kind of offended me.

_This guy's difficult_, I concluded to myself.

I decided to leave him alone and rested my chin on my hands. That was when I noticed that everyone was staring at me. _Maybe it's because I'm new to them_ was the initial reason I thought of. But it made me feel awkward and so to ignore them, I figured, I had to focus on my little bubble with Echizen even if he were a bit difficult.

"Is there dirt on my face?" I asked him. "Everyone's looking at me funny."

His eyes scanned the room before settling down at my face and then he said,

"Nothing on your face. They just like to stare."

"Why would they like to stare at me?"

He kind of was trying to suppress a smile or something. And even though he was cute and all, it was still a very irritating expression. Like I was amusing him somehow. And so I had to ask,

"What's so funny?"

And his smile faded at once.

"Nothing." He replied.

"Then, why were you smiling?" I asked lightly.

He exhaled loudly like I was the irritating one, and then said matter-of-factly,

"Nothing."

Yeah, he was kind of being an irritating jerk that day.

"Okay." I rolled my eyes at him because I was tired of keeping up with his attitude and I wanted him to know it. Unfortunately, he didn't see my expert eye-rolling because he already had his back at me and was already ignoring me.

_So much for being friends with this guy, _I thought,_ he's impossible_.

At lunch that day, Mr. Snob disappeared into who-knows-where and I was left sitting alone when two girls approached me.

"Hi!" The jolly one said. She had brown hair up to her shoulders, round face, and dark brown eyes. "Alice, right?"

I smiled at them.

"I'm Osakada Tomoka. But you can call me Tomo-chan. And this is Sakuno Ryuzaki."

"Hi," said the other girl with the long brown hair in twin braids.

"So was Ryoma-kun nice to you?" Tomo asked suddenly, taking me by surprise.

"Tomo-chan!" Sakuno scolded.

"What?!" Tomo raised her hands innocently.

"We came here to ask her about herself. To get to know her and be friends."

"Oh, come on Sakuno! We'll ask her about that later. We have all the time to get to know her. I know this is what _you_ truly want to know."

_What does that mean?,_ I thought.

And Sakuno, surprised and blushing, kind of pouted at Tomo. "That's not true!"

"Okay, okay." she sighed dramatically.

And they went on, asking me basic things: where I studied and lived before, how I was finding it here, and the like. I answered all of their questions truthfully and realized that they were actually kind of nice. And then, they said if I ever needed anything or if there was something that was confusing me about school, I should tell them. I said okay. That's when I remembered what happened this morning, why everyone was staring. I asked them about it.

Tomo-chan laughed. "I'm sorry you noticed that. Our classmates were just curious."

"Curious about what?" I continued to prod, deciding to get to the bottom of whatever happened.

"It's just that… They weren't staring at you. Well, not exactly." And then she kind of glanced at Sakuno before turning back to me. "They were staring at you _and_ Ryoma-kun."

_ Huh?_

"They were looking to see how you'd react about sitting next to him, I guess." She further explained which I still didn't get. And then, I remembered her asking about Ryoma too and I wondered why everybody seemed so interested with that guy.

"Why is that such a big deal?" I asked.

"Because, uhm. Okay, so I'm guessing by your reaction that you don't know him, do you?" She raised one eyebrow at me.

"No. I've just transferred, remember?"

"No, I mean, you don't know who he is?"

"No, why should I?" And it occurred to me slowly that he was probably famous or something. Hence, the attitude, I concluded. Where there's fame, there's attitude.

"Well, he's…"

And then, Tomo-chan briefed me about who Ryoma was and all that he's done, _blah blah_. Sakuno kind of just smiled at me like_, 'Just bear it'_ and was quiet the whole time. By the end of lunch hour, I've learned how Ryoma Echizen was this-and-that (I couldn't really remember it all). All I understood was that he was a tennis player and that he was really, really popular and was really, really hot (or so Tomo believed) and was really really rich with his own money by now and that he might someday be the core pride of our country. (I didn't get how playing tennis could affect the country and all. I thought you had to at least cure cancer or something to be the core pride of the country. But I didn't say that.)

So when Ryoma returned, I couldn't help but stare at him too, (Oh no, it's a sickness in this class and I'm infected!) thinking about how he was all the things Tomo-chan said he was.

He noticed me staring and said, "What?"

"Huh, what?" I asked back.

"Why are you staring?" He asked in a bored tone.

"Nothing." Ha! Two can play at that game.

He smiled at that. And then, it looked like something had just clicked in his brain.

He sighed and said,

"Okay. So what did you learn about me while I was gone?"

That took me by surprise.

"Uhm… A lot." I said, deciding to be honest.

"And who told you?"

"Tomo-chan."

"So did she ask you to join the Ryoma Echizen fanclub, too?"

"Uh. Yeah. Kinda." He didn't look like he was pissed or anything.

"So did you?" And then, he had this sly smile that again made me think he was finding me funny. And I didn't want him to because I _wasn't_ trying to amuse him. I didn't want him to think I was one of "them" – one of his fanclub members who always have to stare at him, make him the center of their universe.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Not my cup of tea. Honestly, there are other things I'd rather do than ogle at you and marvel at your greatness. I'd sooner shoot myself." There was an edge to my voice, surprising even myself, and I worried that he would find me too nasty as soon as I said it. I didn't even know why I was so angry. I guess I just figured that this town would be different. That this town wouldn't be like my old town where everyone adored those who they think are better than everyone else, which then forces everyone to care about what they do, what they wear, and what they accomplish all of the time.

Turns out this town is exactly the same.

I was on this line of thought when Ryoma's laugh suddenly distracted me. Only, it wasn't really a laugh. It was just some kind of a 'ha-ha'.

I sighed, having had enough of it. "Okay, what's so funny now? And don't tell me it's nothing."

"You're kind of amusing." He shrugged.

"And why is that?"

"You're just different I guess."

"I still don't get it."

"It's hard to explain."

I sighed loudly. And then, he kind of laughed at that too. _Why did he find everything I do amusing?_

And then, he smiled at me - a deep, genuine, sincere smile that suddenly dislodged my thoughts and made my skin feel more like skin. I was stunned. He went staring out of the window again after a while of me just looking at him, trying to figure him out. And we didn't talk to each other again for the rest of that day. But ever since the smile until I was finally able to sleep, I kept on wondering what that smile meant. And I kept on wondering why I kept wondering about it.

When I woke up the next morning though, it wasn't much of a big deal for me anymore. The memory was getting pretty hazy and so I shrugged that maybe I only imagined the smile. Or maybe that he did smile but that it didn't really have to _mean _anything and that I was just overthinking. So I went on with my daily routine.

I was late for class. I hate to admit it but I'm the type of person who is always late. It's a bad habit I can't get myself to quit and I gave up trying years ago. So it wasn't a surprise to see almost no one outside the classrooms, just a few fellow late-comers. I entered the classroom and was surprised that the teacher wasn't in yet which was weird because I heard that he was never late. I made my way to my seat. Everyone else was doing their own thing so nobody really noticed me. Nobody needed a new friend before graduation; they were all busy enough with their own circle. Ryoma was leaning sideways on the wall, his elbow on the windowsill, his hand supporting his head. His eyes were closed and I figured he was taking a nap but when I sat down beside him, his eyes opened up.

"Sorry." I mumbled because I thought I woke him up.

He yawned and stretched and then went back to his initial pose.

"You're awfully late." He pointed out.

"Yep, but Sensei's awfully and fortunately later than I am." I smiled at him.

"He won't be coming. Family member's sick or something."

"Aww. That's awful."

He shrugged. I noted how he seemed to shrug a lot.

"So we can just do anything we want now? He didn't assign an activity? Tell me he didn't."

"He didn't."

"Hurrah!" I beamed and he smirked again but by then, I was used to it so it didn't bug me anymore.

"I have a theory." He suddenly said.

"Hm?"

"I have a theory that you always start off cheerful every morning and you get crankier as the day goes by."

This was a surprise. But I guess I did give him that impression yesterday. So I took it lightly and said,

"It depends."

"Hm?"

"On who I'm sitting next to and if he's irritating me or not. If he's nice, I'm cheerful throughout the day!"

With that, he laughed. "So your mood for the whole year would depend on my attitude towards you?"

Oops, that wasn't what I meant. Well, not really. _Don't think like I have a crush on you! Even if I sort of do now._

"Too bad you're not nice." I deadpanned, trailing away from his question.

"Too bad."

I elbowed his side. "I'm kidding okay? Don't take it seriously."

"I wasn't."

"Taking it seriously?"

"No, kidding…" and then he gave me this sly look that came off to me as _really_ sexy. What was wrong with my hormones?

"I wasn't kidding." He finished with a smile and I laughed awkwardly, still recovering from the feeling of my stomach doing back flips.

I would love to be able to say that from then on, our relationship progressed easily but sadly, it didn't. Days similar to that one have passed and nothing really happened – only that the little crush I had for him seemed to grow a bit bigger each day. Other than that, all we did was small talk. We weren't friends or anything. He still mysteriously disappears during lunch hour and sometimes, he doesn't come back for afternoon classes.

Every lunch hour though, Sakuno and Tomoka would sit with me - a testament to how nice and friendly they were. I was always grateful for their company. They were funny and full of stories. A few weeks of sitting with them at lunch and I've almost known the basics about our other schoolmates and the most exciting stories that had happened around campus throughout their years of stay. Thus said, I've learned a lot about Ryoma too (with Tomo-chan still being the president of Ryoma fanclub and all). I've also learned that Tomoka was dating this Horio guy. He was from another class but they've known each other since middleschool.

"What about you, Sakuno-chan? Who's the lucky guy?" I asked one happy noon.

Sakuno was a shy person and almost always blushed (which I envied because it looked so cute and girly).

Tomo-chan answered for her. "She's dating the ex-captain of the tennis club. He's already a graduate. He graduated last year and was now off to, where was it, Sakuno-chan?"

"New York. He has a tennis scholarship." Sakuno answered quietly.

"Wow." I blurted.

"And she also dated Ryoma-kun, freshman year!" Tomoka, suddenly and very proudly announced. As if it had been _her_ who dated _him_.

This almost knocked me off my seat. _So he likes girly girls, huh? Quiet, shy types._

Sakuno blushed furiously and looked apologetic to me, as if talking about her lovelife might offend me.

"So why did it end?" I asked (which is an acceptable question during girl talk).

"Uhh.."

Tomo raised her eyebrows at Sakuno.

I suddenly got a flashback of Tomo-chan saying _Oh, come on Sakuno! We'll ask her about that later. We have all the time to get to know her. I know this is what _**you**_ truly want to know._

So that was why. They had a past, huh?

"It's kind of… complicated." Sakuno smiled shyly.

"I still think they're meant to be, Alice-chan. I mean, you should have seen them together!" Tomo exclaimed while taking a bite off her apple.

"So are you still friends?" I asked casually.

"Uhm."

"They don't even talk anymore!" Tomo answered with so much enthusiasm it made me wonder if she was also the president of the Ryo-Saku fanclub. "I mean, it might have been a bad breakup but still! All of us have been together since middleschool. You can't just throw away the friendship!"

Sakuno was still just smiling awkwardly.

"Maybe they'll make up and be friends again before graduation." I smiled at Sakuno.

"Maybe." She smiled back but her eyes, I swear, were sad. "I hope so."

After eating, I told Sakuno and Tomoka that I'd just buy a drink downstairs. Truth was, I actually wanted time alone to sort out all of the information I just learned. I went to the vending machine at the back of the school, near the gym because no one ever uses it during lunch hour (it was petty far away from the classrooms) and was therefore still stacked with different kinds of drink. I chose a Ponta Grapes because it was the only kind which, mysteriously, only had one can left and it kind of stood out because of that. _Who'd been buying all the Ponta Grapes? _I wondered.

"You stole my Ponta." Someone suddenly said behind me. I turned around and there he was – Ryoma Echizen. He was smiling slightly, a little slanted to the left, which was just so damn cute I hated it. I hated this stupid crush I had on him. It made me just like everyone else. Just like every other girl. And _he_ believed I was different. Sigh.

"I _bought_ this. I didn't steal anything." I waved the Ponta at him.

"I'll buy it off you." And he gave me this sweet, pretty-please smile. That's when I realized,

"Have you been buying all the Ponta?" I raised my right brow.

He laughed lightly and said, "You caught me."

My heart was beating a bit faster than usual. Did he have this effect on other girls too?

"Is this your kind of addiction?" I asked, trying to be funny.

He shrugged (again!)

"Okay." I said.

"Okay what? As in, _okay_ Ican buy it off you?"

"As in _okay_, you can have it." I stretched my hand to give him the can but he shook his head.

"No. I'll buy it." And then, he started taking out money from his wallet.

"Don't be silly. It's not worth much, just take it"

"No, I'll buy it. Money is money."

"I don't need money." _Not now, atleast._

"Fine, how can I repay you?"

"It's just a drink, Ryoma." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Should I pay you with my body, then?" he smiled slyly, obviously amused, and I turned as red as a tomato all over.

"N-no!" I stammered. Though my inner little devil really wanted to accept the offer and say '_okay_'.

"Then, what? Make up your mind. The bell's about to ring and I want my Ponta." He sighed.

So cute, this childish Ryoma.

I didn't know what triggered it that time, but I suddenly got the giggles. I couldn't stop laughing.

"Why are you laughing?" he asked, and he was kind of laughing at the sight of me laughing, too.

I tried to compose myself but couldn't, so in between laughs, I managed to tell him,

"Nothing."

"You're pretty weird." He said, but atleast he had a smile on his face.

"Atleast, you admit that I'm pretty." I exhaled loudly which shook the laughter off of me. "Why won't you just take it?" I stretched the can out at him again.

"Why won't _you_ just let me buy it?" He countered.

"You sure you don't want to take it? This is your last chance. It's now or never!"

He laughed and shrugged (again!).

"I still want to buy it."

I made the sound of a buzzer and then said,

"Wrong answer! Missed your chance. I'm drinking this, if you want to _buy_ Ponta, buy it somewhere else." I poked my tongue out at him. Very mature.

"Fine." He smiled, stretched out his arm, and patted my head. I froze.

_He touched me!_, I thought. _He freaking touched me!_

I knew it meant nothing, just a friendly, innocent gesture. (Geez, it was just his hand on my head, we've brushed shoulders before as seatmates!) But I still froze and my insides turned to jelly and I think all of my blood went to my face. _Why does he have this effect on me?_ Stupid, little Ponta lover.

He didn't seem to notice all that was happening to me though (thank goodness, he was dense and oblivious) because he gave me one wave as he turned and said,

"Gotta go _buy_ a can somewhere else before the bell rings."

And he jogged away.

I looked at the Ponta Grapes in my hand and one part of my brain thought, '_this stupid crush is just so stupid'_ while the other part of my brain said, _'well, if you can't beat it, give in to it'_.

I sighed.

Have I mentioned that I'm a Gemini?

Days passed routinely and peacefully that I hadn't noticed the arrival of October until Tomo-chan informed me of SeiGaku's Halloween tradition – the Senior Dance.

"So, who would you take to the dance?" she asked on the very first day of October and explained to me that seniors have to wear costumes and that girls get to ask which guy they want to go to the dance with. Usually, the couple would dress in complimentary costumes.

"No idea yet." I answered but my eyes automatically searched the room for Ryoma. I didn't find him. "What about you, Sakuno?"

"She's coming to the dance with her boyfriend!" Tomoka answered for her.

"Really? But I thought he was in New York?"

"He's coming home for a month." Sakuno replied cheerily, she looked so cute.

"Wow. I'm happy for ya, Sakuno-chan. So I'd finally get to meet him, huh?"

"You'll like him" Tomo butt in.

"Looks like I should find my own date, I don't want to be the fifth wheel." I realized.

Tomoka, ofcourse, was going with her boyfriend, Horio, who I met a month ago.

"I could fix you up with Mizuno-kun." Tomo offered. Mizuno was their friend since middleschool too, along with Horio, some other guy, and Ryoma – that is, before Ryoma drifted away from them. I shook my head.

"Nah," I said, "I can manage. If I can't find a date, I just won't go."

"No! Don't be like that, Alice-chan! If you don't find a date, you could still come with us!" Tomo exclaimed.

"She's right. You can't miss this dance." Sakuno agreed.

Their enthusiasm was infectious. It made me not want to miss the dance too.

"Well, I guess I should just find my date real quick."

And my eyes focused on the sliding door, hoping pathetically to see if Ryoma would walk in.

More days passed with me wondering how – if it were even possible- to ask Ryoma to the dance. I have always believed that we should always do the things our hearts tell us to do, and that was what my heart was wanting: to go to the dance with Ryoma. But in this strange world, knowing what you want doesn't guarantee getting it, which means I was nervous and fearful and fickle-minded about it. I also had this nagging thought that I should tell Sakuno that I wanted to go to the dance with Ryoma because Sakuno and I were friends and the two of them had a past, but I also can't get myself to do it. Sometimes, what I wish for most in this world is courage.

By the middle of the month, I gave up. _It's impossible! _Over the couple of days, a lot of girls had already been asking Ryoma to go to the dance with them_. _He may already have a date!

And because I gave up on what my heart was telling me to do, I decided not to go to the dance at all instead of just asking another guy to go with me. You shouldn't do something just for the sake of doing it! You should _want_ to do it! So that was that.

One Thursday of late October though, I was part of the assigned cleaners of our classroom and so had to stay after classes. We finished cleaning in no time and soon enough, all the other cleaners waved me goodbye and headed home. I was waiting for Sakuno that day because she wanted me to help her buy accessories for her costume. So I sat on my desk all alone in the room, too lazy to wander around, and just waited. Fifteen minutes passed and I got tired of just staring into space, so I took out a book from my bag (I always carry a novel with me) and started reading. That day, the novel was _The Alchemist_ by Paulo Coelho. I was getting into the story when Ryoma came in and saw me.

"Hey." He said, which always sounded so cool coming from him.

"Hey." Was my reply, which didn't sound as cool. It didn't even sound cool at all.

He went over to his seat beside mine and grabbed his bag.

"Good book," he said, pointing at _The Alchemist._

I looked at the page I was on, the sentence I was reading said:

'_Listen to your heart. It knows all things,' _

And my heart, back then, was beating faster than usual - which was a reaction I always seemed to get when Ryoma was anywhere near me.

So I decide to take a leap of faith - to clear my mind and just say what I wanted to say. A stupid and dangerous decision.

"Do you want to go to the dance with me?"

_There I said it! There's no turning back! God, what if he turns me down? It'd be so awkward and humiliating! I'd die! I'd die! I'd die! I'd die!_

"Sure." He said nonchalantly.

_I'd die! I'd surely die! I'd – what?_

"Huh?" I asked dumbly.

He was putting some books inside his bag. He looked at me and casually said,

"Sure, let's go to the dance together."

"But why?" My brain wasn't working right; I know I should just say 'okay'. He shrugged, slung his bag to his shoulders and started walking towards the door. When he got to the door, he stopped, turned to look at me, and said,

"Because you asked me to, didn't you?"

"Yeah." I answered breathlessly.

"So there." He waved. "Bye!"

And then, he was gone, leaving me with so many questions in my head. Does that mean he might like me too? A lot of girls asked him, I saw it! But he declined everyone and accepted mine – what does that mean? What costume should I wear? Should we dress in complimentary costumes? Would he pick me up or should we just meet at the gym?

I looked at my trembling (from nervousness) hands, saw the book, and smiled.

'_Oh, to hell with the questions! I can figure that out later. Right now, I should be happy! Ryoma's my date to the dance! Yes! I did it!' _I thought with glee.

I kissed the book and proclaimed out loud - "Paulo Coelho, you're a genius!"

That's when Sakuno came in, smiling. "You really _do_ love your novels." She giggled.

"Um, yeah." I faked laughter.

The moment of triumph has passed and another, more pressing question popped in my head. This one I couldn't just push away.

_How should I inform Sakuno?_

That afternoon, while looking around for fake fangs and contact lenses (Sakuno and her boyfriend would be dressing up as vampire lovers), I planned ways to tell her. I wondered if it was okay. Or since they weren't on speaking terms, maybe it wasn't. I sighed.

_I should just say it_, I thought, _that worked for Ryoma._

She was trying out some bunny ears for fun when, once more, I took a deep breath and plunged in.

"Sakuno, I found a date. I'm going to the dance."

"That's great!" she exclaimed cheerfully. "I was worried that you'd already decided to stay at home. That's why I asked you to come shopping with me. I thought I might get you in the mood to go to the party and change your mind." Sakuno, always the good friend, always trying to think of everybody's feelings - so unlike me.

_Oh well, I'm already in this. There's no turning back._ I closed my eyes and said really quick,

"It's Ryoma-kun!" And then, I waited for the blow! But there was no blow. She just stared at me for a while, her mouth hanging open. When she recovered, she just said,

"Oh." She didn't look angry (yet!), just surprised, so I took the chance. I blurted,

"And I know you two aren't okay, and I know you two used to go out. And I really, really want to stay friends with you and to not upset you, so that's why I'm asking if you mind?"

"Oh." She said again, which only made me more nervous.

This is what guys don't usually know – that we, girls, have a lot of unwritten rules. And one of them is never to go out with a friend's ex. N-E-V-E-R-! Never! But I'm breaking the rule now.

"Do you like him?" she asked and the sad tone in her voice was like a slap to my face. No, it was worse. But I guess I deserved it.

"I think so. I think I always have. Even before I knew you used to date him, I swear!" I heard myself pleading.

"Then, it's fine." She smiled.

"Huh?" Once again, I didn't get the reaction I expected.

"It's fine Alice-chan. You'd be great for him." The way she said it, she really meant it. And I loved her_. I would always, always be a good friend to Sakuno from now on!_

"Uh. Thanks." A weight was lifted and I finally was able to smile back.

She hugged me and I felt her warmth. She was just so nice. She should dress as an angel.

"I really think you could do it. I really think you could make him happy." She said softly and genuinely.

We continued to shop and then went home after. We didn't talk about Ryoma anymore than that but I got myself wondering what she meant by making Ryoma happy. Sure, sometimes he gives off the feeling like he doesn't care about anything in the world. And sure, sometimes he looks a little passive. But he's rich and popular and talented, he _should_ be pretty happy. "So what did Sakuno mean?" I asked myself. Why on earth would Ryoma be unhappy? This started an argument with my Gemini brain.

Twin One: He looks pretty happy to me.

Twin Two: Did he really look happy? Did _you_ look closely? You only know him by sitting beside him. What do _you_ know?

Twin One: I guess I don't know for sure. I just assumed that he was happy.

Twin Two: Ha! Assumptions are often entirely wrong.

Twin One: But why would he be unhappy?

Twin Two: Yeah, why would he be unhappy?

Twin One: Hmm.

Twin Two: Hmm.

Before I went to bed that day, I played back in my mind everything that had happened throughout the day. First, Ryoma. And then, Sakuno. They always never seemed to be the way I expected them to be. They always seemed to take me by surprise.

_Those two._ I wonderedhow they used to be back when they were together. I sighed.

_Odd couple._

The next morning, I was already in my seat when Ryoma arrived, yawning. His hair was sticking in different directions which I found adorable. As he sat, I asked, "So what costume should we wear to the party?" hoping he hadn't forgotten about it. He stared at me for a while, smiled slowly, and said,

"Well, good morning to you too, Toru-chan."

"Yeah, yeah, good morning. So, what do you think?" I pressed on.

He chuckled then shrugged. "I have no idea."

"It's too late to sew our own costumes. Or ask someone to make our costumes." I realized. It was two days before the party.

"We could just buy pre-made costumes." He suggested nonchalantly.

"Went to the shops yesterday with-" I was about to say Sakuno-chan but caught myself. "Anyway, the pre-made costumes suck." And it was true. He laughed at that.

"Then, I guess we should just dress casually."

"But it's a costume party." I whined.

"It's just a party."

"A _**costume **_party." I repeated. He sighed.

"Not everyone's going to be in costumes, trust me. I've known a lot of seniors who didn't dress in costumes during their time."

I figured he was right, but I still scowled and said, "I still want to dress in a costume."

He smirked and then said, "With a scowl like that, you could easily pass as The Grinch Who Stole Christmas." I slapped his arm, laughing as Sensei asked everyone to settle down and be quiet.

In the end we agreed to just dress casually and meet at the gym at six o'clock.

At the day of the party, I couldn't help feeling both nervous and excited at the same time. I knew it wasn't really a date but _still_. I wore my silver heels and dressed up in a short white dress which my mom said was too short for my age but I ignored. Tomo-chan still didn't know about Ryoma being my date but had been happy about the fact that I would come to the party. She assumed I'd be coming alone and said I could hang around him and Horio and their other friends. I felt bad not telling her the entire truth but knowing Tomoka, she'd make a big fuss about it which I'd rather face just at the day of the party rather than the day of the party and _all_ of the days leading to the party. Whenever I thought about it, I just had to smile a nervous smile. Everyone will surely be surprised when I walk in with Ryoma and a lot of girls (including the Echizen fanclub) would probably be pissed and asking _"Why is Ryoma-kun with that new girl? Who does she think she is?" _But this was what I wanted so I should be able to handle it. Sigh. Why did he have to be so popular? Why can't he just be a regular guy who, preferably, nobody else notices but me?

Going back to the story. I was supposed to meet Ryoma by six but as I've mentioned earlier, I'm a chronic late-comer. By the time I got to the meeting place (which was by the vending machine), it was already half past six and he wasn't there. I worried that he may have had lost patience and already left and I cursed myself for being so stupid when I spotted him walking towards me. _Thank God, he was later than me!_ He was dressed in jeans, sneakers and a gray hoodie and I thought how unfair it was that he looked gorgeous even without trying while I had to wear this short dress and walk in these high heels and wear make up to look even remotely good. He smiled when he saw me, and I smiled back.

"I feel underdressed. I thought we were going casual?" He said as he stopped in front of me.

"This is casual for me." I shrugged, hoping he wouldn't notice me blushing.

"And it is also too short."

"What are you, my dad?" I rolled my eyes and he laughed.

"Don't blame me when you get cold." He started, "But the color of the dress is just right for your costume." His eyebrows were both raised and he had this mischievous grin as he said it.

"What costume?"

And with a swift motion, he produced something from inside his jacket. "Te-den!" he said in a sing-song as he waved the things in front of me. That's when my mind registered that they were headbands. One was a white-and-golden feathery halo. The other was devil's horns (the one which had a light switch for the light bulb inside the red horns). I couldn't believe that he'd even given a thought about it. And I didn't understand how this simple gesture from him could mean a great deal for me.

"Awww," I exclaimed with glee, "We still get to dress up!"

"Yep. You're the angel seeing as you're dressed in white," and he placed the headband carefully on my head as I grinned like an idiot. "Which means I get to be the devil." And he placed his on his head.

"Great idea, I must say."

He scoffed arrogantly and rolled his eyes at me. "Always the tone of surprise." He said with a smile.

"I just thought you didn't care about the costumes." I still had this big, stupid grin on my face.

"I didn't. But you obviously did so when I saw these on my way home yesterday, I thought it's enough to atleast make you happy." He shrugged as if he hadn't said something awfully nice and I felt this calm soothing warmth of pure happiness all over me. _It did make me happy._ I wanted to tell him. Instead, I said,

"But our costumes don't match. Well, not really. Why didn't you just buy two of those devil's horns or two of this halo? That way, we can be a pair."

He shrugged. "Wouldn't it be more interesting?"

"Wouldn't _what_ be more interesting?"

"This pair. An angel and a devil."

"I guess. Odd couple though. I think I've read a children's story about it once. About an angel and a devil falling in love."

"What happened to them in the story?" he asked, genuinely interested.

"If I remember right, the devil tried to live in heaven for a while but realized it was too boring for him there. So the angel agreed to live with the devil in hell, but when she got there, her angel wings burned, so she couldn't fly. And flying was something she loved to do so she hated the place."

"Pretty tragic for a children's story." He commented.

"Well, it's just a story." I shrugged.

"So what happened then?" I was surprised he was still interested in the story.

"Well, I think they realized that they were never really meant for each other so the devil brought the angel back to heaven where she regained her wings. While the devil went back to the underworld and back to his old life before he met the angel. But even though they were back to their own versions of 'heaven', it was never the same again. Because it never seemed complete anymore without each other. Their heavens were never enough since then." I finished, relieving the sadness I felt when I first heard the story as a child.

"Wow. That was…" and he stopped for a while to search for the right word, "… _tragic_." He said once more.

"It is. That's why I've always liked it."

"Now I feel like our headbands are more interesting than I thought."

"You find tragedy interesting?"

"No, but the forbidden love part was interesting." He admitted.

_I like Ryoma when he's in a good mood_, I told myself as we walked towards the gym. _More than I'm supposed to, maybe._

There were already a lot of people dressed as different characters while some were, sure enough, not costumed at all. And I was happy to be in the middle – to be casually dressed but still in costume. The music was loud and the noise from the chatter of people was louder. The night sky was just starting to unfold and the air was just starting to get colder. Halfway through the gym, I stopped and asked him,

"So, which one is this, Mr. Devil? Is this your hell or my heaven?"

In which he responded, "Let's go and find out."

I had the feeling that the night would be perfect either way.


	3. Chapter 2: Puzzles and Secret Places

**A/N:**

**Sorry for the late update! Well, here it is. ^^**

**Disclaimer: I do not own PoT. (watta shame, *cry*)**

**"Close our eyes, pretend to fly." –me, singing**.

P.S. This is the edited chapter, forgot to edit it earlier when i published it. The story didn't change anyway, just the format and pacing. Okay, i'm gonna stop yapping now. ^^

* * *

**Chapter Two**

**Puzzles and Secret Places.**

Sometimes, I feel like our lives are completely uncontrollable and that we are simply drifting in the wind – randomly falling on the ground, or flying high up in the sky, or landing on a safe and beautiful place. But most of the time, I feel like our lives are controlled by this twisted force we all call fate. And one of my favorite authors once said that _'Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant, filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like'. _I completely agree with him_._ Fate is schizophrenic. Fate is bi-polar. Fate is a slut who screws everybody. On the night of the dance, for example, all I wanted was to have fun with and get to know more of Ryoma and then go home and sleep with happy memories. But what happened was… well, a lot of unexpected things happened.

The moment we stepped into the gym, I braced myself. I knew that everyone was gonna be staring and I'm not being conceited here, because everyone surely did. As you know, I'm not quite fond of being stared at and so I felt shy and self-conscious and kept my eyes on my feet. Ryoma led me to the right side of the gym but I still felt the crowd's eyes boring into me. Ryoma, probably because he was used to all of it, obliviously grabbed two bottles of root beer and handed one to me. And then, he might have noticed my silence and awkwardness because he asked, "What's wrong?"

I grabbed the root beer and said, "Nothing."

"Which means something _is_ wrong, only you're not going to tell me so I better figure it out myself."

That brought back my smile. I reminded myself that I shouldn't think about everyone else, especially when Ryoma was being so easy to get along with that night.

"You're awfully smart." I joked but I decided to tell him anyway. "It is just that… how do you handle being stared at all of the time?"

He feigned shock. "Huh? People stare at me?"

"Don't tell me you haven't noticed! I have only been beside you in a few occasions and _I_ have already noticed."

He shrugged, "They lose interest eventually."

"What does that mean?"

"It only means they stop staring after a while, so you know it'll end sooner or later."

I took a sip on the root beer and muttered, "The woes of fame." And I laughed. I looked around and sure enough, most have already had their attention on something else.

"Anyway," Ryoma pointed the tip of his bottle towards me. "How do you know it's me they're staring at? There were two of us who entered the gym at the same time."

I liked that he said 'us'.

"But they always stare at you! Why would they stare at me?"

"I can sight a number of reasons."

"And _I _can sight a number of reasons on why they're definitely staring at you." I countered.

"Maybe they didn't expect you to dress as an angel."

"Maybe they didn't expect _you_ to dress as a devil and come to the dance with a random girl."

"A random girl?" His eyebrows went up.

"Yeah, a random girl - me."

He slightly shook his head. "They're probably surprised that you came to the dance with a jerk pretending to be a devil and they're thinking about how you could do better."

"Or, and I believe I'm right, they're thinking about how I have the nerve to be with this well-loved devil here and they're probably thinking 'What was Ryoma-kun thinking?'" I pointed out flatly.

"Do you really feel that – "

But he didn't get to finish his sentence because something (or someone) by the gym entrance seemingly caught his attention. At his abrupt silence, I immediately followed his gaze and saw two gorgeous vampires who had just arrived. One was Sakuno, dressed in a pretty black dress and black heels with red lipstick, which for me, made her look sophisticated. And the guy, who I assumed was Sakuno's current boyfriend from New York, was dressed in a suit. Honesty, I thought they looked good together. _And_ they looked happy.

Sakuno's eyes scanned the room, and met mine. She gave me a little shy smile. But my eyes automatically searched for Ryoma's expression – which was blank. He didn't reveal anything. He didn't seem angry or jealous or happy to see them or whatever. It just seemed like he saw something that mildly surprised him for a while but that he has now decided that it didn't interest him anymore. Still, I decided not to comment on it. But I couldn't think of what to say next so there was this moment of absolute silence between us. That was when I heard Tomo-chan shout.

"ALICE-CHAN? RYOMA-KUN? YOU GUYS ARE TOGETHER?" She marched towards where Ryoma and I were, her eyes wide, dragging a reluctant Horio with her. And even with the loud party music, her voice seemed to shatter everyone's attention and shift it towards us - again. And I was so embarrassed that my face flushed and I regretted not having had informed her earlier.

Tomo-chan reached our spot and looked from Ryoma to me and then back, over and over with a bewildered look on her face.

"What in the world is this?" she asked with disbelief that made me feel like I was committing a crime. Like adultery or something.

"Tomo-chan. I can explain." I said stupidly with an awkward smile.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?" She asked pointedly at me.

"I didn't think it mattered. I didn't think it was much of a deal." I lied. On my peripheral vision, I saw Ryoma scratching his cheek and looking like he had seen a lot of this from Tomoka before.

"BUT IT IS! I'M THE PRESIDENT OF THE RYOMA-KUN FANCLUB! SO I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT… THIS!"

"Uhhh..." I ran out of things to say.

"Does Sakuno-chan know about this?" Thankfully, she kept her voice down when she asked this question. But I still preferred it if he hadn't asked it infront of Ryoma because it made me feel awkward. Ryoma raised his eyebrows, and looked at me - waiting for my answer. And for a moment, I just had to think.

Twin One: Since Ryoma always disappears for lunch and comes back late, he is not aware that I am friendly with his ex-girlfriend and Tomo-chan.

Twin Two: Yeah, but he's seen us talk. He should have atleast guessed.

Twin One: Just casually talking is different from sitting with them at lunch and hanging out with them after school! Casually talking means acquaintances, sitting with them at lunch and hanging out after school means friends! And-

Twin Two: Friends don't go out with friend's exes. Yeah, yeah. Who made that rule anyway?

Twin One: Do you think he'd be happy to know that you and her ex-girlfriend talks about him? Particularly, about you going out with him tonight.

Twin Two: What's wrong with that? So what if Sakuno-chan and I are friends?

Twin One: Wouldn't it seem like a conspiracy? Talking about him, passing him on.

Twin Two: Oh shit. This is so confusing.

Twin One: Do you think he'd want to be near someone who's friends with someone he doesn't want to even talk to?

Twin Two: Just shut up! Shut up for a moment okay?!

I could feel everyone's eyes waiting for me to answer but before I could figure out what to say, Horio spoke up.

"So Ryoma," he started in that squeaky voice of his, "Momo-senpai's in town huh. He's here. Have you seen him?"

Ryoma kind of smiled a dry smile and said, "Of course I've seen him." And I noticed how Tomo-chan nudged her boyfriend with so much force, I was surprised when Horio didn't even seem to notice.

"He says he's only in vacation for a month, though. He's flying back to New York at the end of- Ow!" He exclaimed when Tomo-chan yanked his armed down.

"What?" Horio asked her.

"Just shut up, you-"

"It's a long time ago! It's nothing anymore!" he turned to Ryoma, "Right?"

And now everyone's eyes were on him, expecting his answer. Including me.

"Yeah," Ryoma said. "It's nothing."

Tomoka kind of gave a sigh of relief while Horio said "See? I told you so!" to her. I caught Ryoma glance at me once before he immediately looked away. I, on the other hand, didn't know what to feel.

It was obvious that they were talking about Sakuno and her boyfriend, who I guessed was Momo-senpai. _It's a long time ago! It's nothing anymore!,_ Horio had said. But what does "_it"_ mean? What happened exactly? Of course it had something to do with the break-up but I also knew that there was something I wasn't seeing. Like this puzzle was still missing crucial pieces.

On the other hand, I felt relieved too. Ryoma had said that it was 'nothing' anymore. So it means it shouldn't matter to him anymore if Sakuno and I _were_ friends and did, sort of, talk about him. Or so, that's what I wanted to believe.

Horio then asked Ryoma to accompany him outside; he said he needed to talk to Ryoma alone. Ryoma agreed and left without even saying anything to me, which made me sad. And then, Tomo-chan and I were left standing there, so she decided to suddenly drag me towards the other end of the gym where Sakuno was. She didn't seem upset that I was with Ryoma though, so I figured she didn't mind about that part. She was really just surprised that I didn't tell her about it and had maybe decided to forgive me for it.

Sakuno waved when she saw us approaching.

"Sakuno-chan, I came to introduce Ali-chan to Momo-senpai." She stated happily.

"Oh, okay." Sakuno said. "This is Alice-chan, Takeshi. Alice Toru." She said to her boyfriend. The guy was tall with a goofy smile and a care-free vibe around him. He offered his hand and I shook it.

"And this is Takeshi Momoshiro-senpai." Tomoka told me gesturing towards Momo-senpai.

"Hi. So you're the new girl Sakuno and Tomo-chan were talking about." He smiled his goofy smile at me.

"Depends on what they're telling you. I won't own up to it if it's bad." I replied but my mind was somewhere else - thinking about Ryoma and where he was and when will he get back and if he minded me shaking hands with this guy.

Momo-senpai chuckled. "No, no. Only good things. You're an angel after all."

I smiled at him, thinking of ways to excuse myself so I could search for Ryoma. At that moment, Horio returned but I noticed that Ryoma wasn't with him. He scanned the gym, spotted Tomo-chan, and went over to where we were.

"Where's Ryoma?" I couldn't help but ask him as soon as he was hearing distance.

"Still outside." He shrugged.

"Why?" And I was surprised by the distress and panic in my voice. But thinking about Ryoma probably being upset _had_ caused me panic and distress - even if I weren't exactly sure if he _was_ really upset.

"I dunno." Horio answered passively which irritated me. I wanted details! I wanted to know if he looked angry or upset or whatever. Or if he was going back to the party. But Horio was a boy, and boys don't get things like that.

Tomoka and Sakuno, being girls and also being my friends, seemed to notice my distress though. Because Tomo-chan immediately said, "I think you should go find him." Which I've been wanting to do ever since he left. Sakuno didn't say anything but she nodded her head in agreement.

I was about to say "Okay, I'll go. Excuse me." But was interrupted by Momo-senpai.

"I'll go." He said and my mind screamed _No! _

I can see in Sakuno and Tomoka's expression that their minds were thinking the same thought. But, like Horio-kun, Momo-senpai was a guy. And they don't get these things.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Sakuno said with a look at his boyfriend which seemed to say _'And you know perfectly well I'm right'_. But being a guy (sigh), Momo-senpai ignored her and said,

"It's time we talk anyway."

"No." Sakuno said flatly.

"Why not? He should stop acting like a kid. And he shouldn't leave a girl alone and expect her to be the one who goes around looking for him."

I was about to say it was okay but I noticed the look on Sakuno's face which startled me. It was panic. Panic and fear. And I clearly understood what she was panicked about.

"Takeshi," Sakuno stared, "I think you shouldn't-"

But Momo-senpai was already on his way, grinning at me and saying, "Don't worry. I'll find that little devil and get him to come to you."

And in that moment, I kind of realized something. The way he talks about Ryoma made me figure out what the missing pieces of the puzzle were.

"I think I should follow him." Sakuno said, like it was the last thing she wanted to do.

"I think I should look for Ryoma-kun." I replied.

"I think we should just chill guys. Why is everyone so intense?" Horio laughed awkwardly and Tomo-chan rolled her eyes at him.

"Yeah. Yeah, maybe he's right." I slowly agreed. "Maybe we should just wait for them to come back."

And everyone nodded. Because that was what everyone wanted to happen – for everything to be okay. We wanted to believe that there really was no reason for our nervousness. We wanted Momo-senpai to come back with Ryoma-kun, with smiles and laughter, and we wanted them to join us and maybe Ryoma would finally talk to Sakuno. And then, we'll all enjoy the dance as a group of friends and all go home happily. Yes, that was what we wanted to believe. But sadly, we all knew, deep within us, that it was not the case. So we stood there in silence, waiting for the event that would wake us out of our delusion and into the reality. It came after 10 minutes.

"Sakuno-chan! Toru-san!" A girl from our class, who was dressed as a Greek goddess, stopped in front of us, panting. She had obviously been running. We all stood frozen, watching her.

"Ryoma-kun and Momo-senpai… Outside… a Fight!" she stammered.

Sakuno and I looked at each other and saw our mirrored expression in each other faces. And after a moment of pure shock, we went into action and hurried outside.

It wasn't right outside the entrance, it was a little to the side of the gym. So we turned a corner and when we got there, there were already a number of people watching. We had to squeeze in to get to the middle of the crowd where we found Ryoma and Momoshiro, in this circle, smiling wickedly at each other. My eyes, ofcourse, first scanned Ryoma. He had a cut on the side of his lower lip, a bruise on his cheek, and another cut under his left eye, which was dripping blood. He had this murderous look on his eyes. I looked at Momo-senpai and he too had cuts and bruises. On both sides of his cheek, on his lower lip too. And he too, had this murderous look. They both looked like they were actually trying to kill each other.

Up until then, I have always thought that boy fights were actually kind of cool - That boys are not boys if they don't get into one of these fights. And if the fight was over a girl, I'd actually think it was romantic. But seeing Ryoma bruised, I've realized that, no, I never want him to get into a fight. Not for a girl, not for anything, not even for me. It wasn't noble or romantic, it was just plain scary. Scary to imagine someone you care about receive a punch. Scary to watch that blood from the cut under his eye glisten. Scary to see that murderous gleam in his eyes. It wasn't anything but horrifying.

"Stop!" I heard Sakuno scream, even if the two boys weren't doing anything yet but stare at each other menacingly. I looked at her and saw what I was feeling etched in her face.

"Stop it!" she repeated, tears forming at the back of her eyes and her voice breaking. "Just… stop."

The two boys looked at her, and then looked back at each other.

Ryoma scoffed arrogantly. "Oh, look. She's crying." He said dryly, throwing his hands in the air.

"Wow, guess you still never really fail to do that." Momo-senpai retorted.

"Ha! You actually blame me for this?!"

Now, Momo-senpai dropped the sneer and just completely yelled at Ryoma. "NOT TALKING TO HER! NOT EVEN LOOKING AT HER! THE WAY YOU AVOID HER, ANYONE WOULD THINK SHE HAS SOME KIND OF DISEASE! CAN'T YOU SEE IT'S TORTURE FOR HER TO SEE YOU ACT LIKE THAT? ISN'T IT ENOUGH?"

And then, Momo-senpai shook his head, a look of pain on his face, and said slowly.

"No, no… Ofcourse, for you, it isn't enough. You always were a sore loser. THAT'S WHY IT'S OKAY FOR YOU TO SEE HER SUFFER!"

And he lunged to throw a punch at Ryoma but Sakuno stopped him. She wrapped her arms around him to restrain him and she stopped his advance. Not because Sakuno actually overpowered him but because he was afraid to trample on Sakuno if he pushed his way through.

"Stop Takeshi! Just please stop this!" But Sakuno's pleas weren't reaching him.

Maybe it was seeing Sakuno wrapped around Momo-senpai, which made Ryoma explode in anger too. It was his turn now.

"SUFFER?!" He yelled. "_SUFFER?_ _I _make _her_ SUFFER?! You have the _nerve_ to actually say that! Oh yeah, I forgot how you just loved being her knight in shining armor. Is this how it was back then? She goes running to you like that and you throw knives behind my back to impress her?!"

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO RUINED THIS FRIENDSHIP! AND YOU DID IT FOR A GIRL? THAT'S JUST-" But he couldn't finish it – like it was just too hard to find a word to properly describe what it was. And then, he lunged too. But Horio restrained him before he even got close to Sakuno and Momo-senpai.

It seemed like Momo-senpai and Ryoma weren't even aware of everyone, they only had eyes –deadly eyes- for each other. And I feared for what would happen once Horio and Sakuno weren't able to restrain them anymore.

For a moment, I felt my spirit drifting away. I literally felt like I was having an out-of-body experience. I saw Momo-senpai push Sakuno slightly out of the way. Ryoma shoving Horio off of him. They lunge at each other and Ryoma's fist connects first with Momo-senpai's nose but Momo-senpai was able to knee Ryoma in the gut in the process. It was all so spellbinding, that after a while, I can't seem to comprehend the details anymore. It was like watching time go by without you being in it. All I knew was that people were screaming and some were trying to restrain them. Sakuno was screaming frantically and Tomo-chan too. Horio was also lost in this mess, trying to mediate. And I was just waiting for it to be over. I felt like I've had enough of this night, of this drama, of SeiGaku.

I wasn't aware of how much time had passed, but eventually it was over. I drifted back to my body. Sakuno was dragging Momo-senpai away and Tomo-chan was fumbling over Horio, who also received a few small bruises of his own by trying to stop the fight. Ryoma and Momo-senpai were still having this glaring contest, that is, until Sakuno and Momo-senpai turned a corner and disappeared from view. The people thinned. Tomo-chan dragged Horio away from the gym, saying he needed to see a doctor. The few people kept their distance, gossiping for sure about what happened. And I stood there, frozen. I don't know if it was the shock that kept me from moving, or the concern about Ryoma's well-being. All I know was that I just stood there like an idiot.

Ryoma wiped his mouth with his sleeve and spat blood on the ground. That's when he turned and noticed me. It was hard to miss me of course, since I was the only person left near the _'scene of the crime'_. He looked surprised - like he forgot he came to this party with me and was now slowly remembering who I was.

"Hey." He said slowly, wide-eyed.

I didn't know what I looked like but I probably was wide-eyed too. He sort of dusted some parts of him, and then he stepped forward, in front of me. And just like that he was back to the Ryoma I knew, smiling like nothing ever happened. He was actually smiling a goofy smile but I couldn't get my eyes away from the wounds on his face.

"That's gonna scar. You'll be ugly for a couple of weeks." I blurted.

"Yeah," he shrugged.

"Does it hurt?" I asked - the question I've been wanting to ask for so long. And I don't know why but I felt like crying. I didn't though. Not yet.

He shook his head, and then exhaled loudly.

"Not yet," he said. "'It's probably still numb. But God help me tomorrow morning."

I finally smiled at this but I was a nervous wreck inside. My heart was having a mini-heart attack.

"Sorry for ruining your first party at SeiGaku." He dropped his gaze, scratched his cheek.

I know it's a silly thought but I felt like he just came back from war, you know? Like that fight with Momo-senpai was a battlefield and he managed to come home - bruised, sure, but alive. I wanted to hug him and just weep.

"Party's over, I guess." I said weakly.

"Let's get you home." He replied, taking a step forward.

"Hold on!" I took a few paces backward, crouched, and picked up a tiny broken headband. I've noticed it while I was in the trance mode, and only just remembered it. I stood up and walked towards him.

"It's broken." I said as I dangled the devil's horns in front of him – it was broken in half.

He shrugged. "There's nothing we can do. Just leave it."

I shook my head. "Nah. I'll keep it."

"It's broken." He pointed out like I haven't realized that.

"I can fix it." And I felt so sure about it.

"You don't have to. Let's just find another one."

"No. What would I do with a new one? I want _this _one."

And I suddenly felt like I was using this headband as a metaphor for Ryoma - broken. But I want it and it's fixable – I could fix it! Right? The thought made me want to cry, again. But I still didn't.

"Whatever you want." He conceded.

I wish I did get whatever I wanted.

"I don't wanna go home yet." I told him.

He raised his eyebrows at me. "You want to stay here?"

"No, of course not. But I'm hungry." And just as I said it, I realized how true it was. We hadn't eaten any of the party food. Just the rootbeer.

He touched his tummy, and said. "Yeah, I think I am too."

"Then, let's grab a bite! My treat!" I beamed, shoving the broken headband into my pouch.

"What. Is. _That_?!" I exclaimed, horrified at the shiny ride Ryoma was sitting on.

"It's called a motorbike. Welcome to the 21st century!" He said with a smile as he inserted the keys and started the engine.

He stretched out his arm and was handing me a helmet but once again, I was shocked frozen, gaping at him like an idiot. I have never ridden a motorbike before then, and quite frankly, I wasn't looking forward to riding one (I'll stick to my limo fantasy, thank you very much). I was definitely not expecting this from an average senior highschool student. But then again, maybe Ryoma wasn't your average highschool student.

"And you're driving?" I asked, still not sure what I should do.

"Yep." He replied, dangling the helmet in front of me.

"But you're not wearing a helmet." I pointed out.

"We're not driving that far."

"Then, why do I get to wear one?"

"So I can fool you into thinking this is safe." He grinned.

"Let's just go walk." I suggested nervously.

"That's even more dangerous. You're dressed like-" And he waved his hand up and down at me, "_that_. It'll attract too much attention. Someone crazy out there can just beat me up to a pulp and snatch you away."

I looked at my dress, and heels. It _was_ a little too less. He continued,

"And speaking of that…" he took off his hoodie and dusted it in the air. He tossed it to me. He was wearing a checkered shirt underneath. "Wear that over your dress. You'll get cold."

I did as I was told. This little gesture actually made me happy – made me feel so feminine. His hoodie was too big for me of course and so I had to roll up the sleeves. But it did feel warm. I didn't realize how cold the night was until I put it on.

"So, let's go?" he dangled the helmet in front of me again.

"Please promise you won't get me killed! Oh! And go real slow." I took off my angel headband thinking _'goodbye angel wings, time to learn how to fly - Ryoma style' _and also shoved it in my pouch_._ I took the helmet and was putting it on but I couldn't seem to lock it properly and so, Ryoma yanked me closer to him as he adjusted the helmet into place.

"Are you scared?" He asked with a smile, still adjusting my helmet.

"Yes, I'm dead scared." I admitted. But at the time, I was actually conscious of how close he was to me and that fact was starting to make me forget the fear I was feeling before.

"Trust me." He said softly, his concentration on the helmet. And I knew I did.

"Just make sure I don't fall off, okay?" I answered back.

He patted my head, finally done with the helmet, convinced it was properly protecting my skull.

"There. Now, even if you fall off, you won't die."

I punched his arm and he laughed. I reluctantly hopped on the bike and felt like it was too frail – too small to be ridden. A bus can floor this thing like a piece of cake! I forced myself to stay calm.

"Hold on to me." He instructed. And for this - and just for this- I can actually force myself to like motorbikes. I wrapped my arms around him, holding on tight. Even with the giddiness I was feeling about touching him, I still had to make sure I wouldn't fall off. It wasn't all fun.

"Ready?" He looked at me over his shoulder.

"If you must." I told him, rolling my eyes. He smiled at me before looking ahead, the engine roared – too loud against the quiet night.

"Don't worry, I'll be careful so you won't fall." He assured me.

The bike lurched, and then moved forward with surprising speed. As I held on tightly, I thought about the party, and the fight, and if I should talk to him about it. I made a mental note to buy some Band-Aids and some medicine to clean his wounds and fix him up. I thought about tomorrow and the next day, wondering what revelation about Ryoma would jump up and surprise me next. I closed my eyes and sighed, felt the wind on my face, surprisingly starting to enjoy the ride while being terrified at the same time.

I felt like I've already fallen.

I was in-charge of buying things to clean up his wounds and he was in-charge with food. We were at a 24/7 convenience store and I grabbed cotton buds, a bottle of hydrogen peroxide, some bandages – because he said his hand hurt - and just for the heck of it, a box of cute pink Band-Aids. It was so cute; I figured it'll look funny on his face. He appeared behind me carrying a big bottle of soda, some paper cups, hotdog sandwiches, and some chips. I hid the box of Band-Aids quickly, away from his view.

"Got everything?" He inquired.

I beamed. "Yep!"

We made our way to the counter and on a rack beside it, some green bottles suddenly caught my attention – champagne. I had this crazy thought.

"Ne, Ryoma-kun. What do you say to a bottle of champagne?"

He was dumping his goodies on the counter, looked over his shoulder at me, and said,

"Why would you want to drink that right now?"

I shrugged. "No reason. I've just never tasted it before." And it was true. My parents never let me take a sip.

He smiled slyly at me, "What would your parents say if I take you home, drunk?"

I shrugged. "We won't get drunk. We'll drink just a little."

"That's what every alcoholic tell themselves at first."

But I pressed on. "Come on, let's have some fun! I was out to have fun tonight. I'll pay for it!"

He sighed, completely giving up, and picked up a bottle of champagne. I intentionally played out the guilt card – reminding him why I wasn't having fun right now at the Senior Dance.

"Fine. But if you get drunk, I swear – "He let the threat hang as I bounced up and down giddily beside him.

I dumped my goodies on the counter. The girl behind the counter looked as young as we were, and she was staring at Ryoma. I guess his bruised face did sort of catch attention.

"I got this." Ryoma said, already taking money out from his wallet.

"No! I said it's my treat."

The girl behind the counter rolled her eyes at us like _these kids should just move on_.

"Too late." Ryoma said and handed the girl his credit card.

This time, I didn't argue. I knew he wouldn't let me pay anyway once his mind was made up, just like he wouldn't let me give him the can of Ponta for free. He's just like that. But then again, most guys are. Must be some kind of machismo thing, I figured.

"You have a credit card?" I asked with awe. I didn't believe teenagers should have credit cards until they make their own money and are capable of paying for the credit. And then, I remembered that Ryoma probably _did_ have his own money.

He gave me a look that says _'please don't gush, it's not that amazing'_.

The lady put all that we have bought in two paper bags. I grabbed both as Ryoma signed. He took both bags from me afterwards and then, we were out into the streets again.

"Now where?" I asked him.

We decided to leave the motorbike in the parking lot of the convenience store and walked towards the nearby park. It was deserted of course, but also very pretty. It was quiet and beautiful – in a weird, lonely way. I thought we would sit on a bench or something but Ryoma just kept on walking.

"Uh. Ryoma-kun? Isn't this an okay spot already?" I asked, motioning at another bench we have just passed.

He looked over his shoulder, to me again. "It is an okay spot. But I know a better spot."

"So you come here often?" I joked.

"Not very much lately."

He led me through this thick set of bushes and after a while of finding my way with difficulty, we emerged into a clearing. At first glance, it wasn't phenomenal – just a normal clearing probably too deep in the thicket so no one really notices, except for Ryoma, that is. At second take, I noticed its beauty. The grassy circle had no trees to obscure the clear night sky, and in a distance was the horizon, where you feel like the vast sky and this grassland connected. There were also flowers, lots and lots of them. And stars. And it was so quiet and detached from the world. The park actually seemed so far away. I wondered how Ryoma stumbled upon this place.

"Wow." I said, looking around.

He had already placed the bags on the ground, almost in the center of the clearing. And then, he sat cross-legged on the ground, taking the contents out one by one.

"How'd you find this place?" I asked, taking a seat beside him.

He shrugged. "When I was a child, I briefly lived in the States…"

"That must have been nice." I butt in.

"It was okay. Anyway, one summer, my parents decided to come here for a short vacation. Or maybe someone died and they had to go to a funeral? I don't really remember. I was too young back then." He said as he opened the bottle of soda. "Anyway, I hated it. Of course, I was just a kid. This place was foreign and scary to me. I threw a fit and my mom took me to this place."

He poured soda on one paper cup and handed it to me. He continued,

"She said that she and my old man would be busy for the next few days and if I ever get bored, or scared, or if I needed some time off alone, I could come here. She said this was her secret place when she was younger, and no one knows about it - absolutely no one. Just the two of us, not even dad. She said if I didn't like to stay in the house, and they weren't there to look after me, I could just leave without permission, but _this_ is the only place I should go to. That way she'll know where to find me if I suddenly disappear."

I imagined what Ryoma's mom looked like and what Ryoma looked like as a kid.

"So you live nearby?" I guessed.

He nodded.

"Your mom's pretty clever." I pointed out, taking a sip of soda. He handed me a hotdog sandwich. I took it and took a bite.

"I thought so too at that time. But my old man, when he found out, said it was pretty careless of her." He took a bite off his sandwich and then grimaced. He touched the cut on his lower lip.

"We should get to that. It hurts?" I asked.

"Yeah, but whatever." He chewed. "I'm too hungry to care."

We both laughed at that until he realized that laughing hurt him too.

"We must've looked pretty stupid." He sighed. I took this as my cue to talk about it.

"Say, Ryoma-kun, what really happened back there?"

"It's hard to say." He crinkled his brow.

I grabbed the champagne and removed the cork with a few twists. It popped and some foamy champagne spilled out.

"It'll be easier with champagne! Let's drink to your worries!" I shouted like an idiot. _Whatever_, I thought, we were in a secret place anyway. We could act however we wanted to act. And I wanted to cheer him up. I wanted him to be happy after that helluva party.

He laughed and said, "Don't get drunk."

"Hey, I have a great idea! Let's drink straight from the bottle! Like hard drinkers do."

He laughed even harder even though it hurt him everytime, so his face was torn in between laughing and grimacing in pain. It was music to my ears – that carefree laugh of his. I promised to commit it to memory.

I took a swig from the bottle - my first taste of champagne.

"Oh. My. God!" I gasped. He was staring at me intently, as if knowing this would happen.

"That tastes like… like happiness!" I exclaimed and I meant it. I took another drink and then stretched my arm, giving the bottle to him.

He took it but didn't drink right away.

"One thing you should know," he said first, "is that you should never drink with an empty stomach. No matter if it's only champagne. So, finish that hotdog first." I did as I was told, eating fast.

"Why?" I asked in between bites.

"It'll get you drunk faster."

"Is that the number one rule about drinking?"

"No. The number one rule is never to drink alone with a guy you barely know, in a place you're not familiar with, especially, at the late hours of the night." He stared at me meaningfully and I ignored him. I knew he was harmless. Or at least I thought I did.

I swallowed champagne and then I dead-panned, "I like to live life on the edge."

He burst out in laughter and I joined in. We looked like complete idiots, laughing our heads off.

"All in one night, I've witnessed a fist fight, ridden a motorbike, and drank with a guy alone in a place I barely know at this late hour of the night. You're turning me into a rebel." I joked.

He finally drank champagne from the bottle and then said,

"This _does_ sort of taste like happiness."

We took a break from our drinking so I can clean up his bruises. We sat facing each other and he handed me his right hand first. I took it, wondering what holding his hand would feel like. Strangely though, it didn't make me feel like anything. No giddiness, no blushing. It actually felt normal – no, natural. Like I've been holding this hand forever and am used to it. Or maybe the champagne just took away my nerves.

Anyway, his hand was a bit sore and there were bruises in his knuckles. I felt like the time when I first took home a stray puppy. He was quietly watching me. I dabbed some hydrogen peroxide to clean it first.

"It just goes to show that when you throw a punch, you get hurt in the process too." I thought out loud.

He didn't say anything.

"Hey, Ryoma-kun. Who threw the first punch?" I asked without hesitation, figured that he was probably expecting me to ask questions sooner or later.

"I did." He admitted.

"So, you just punched him the moment he got close to you?"

"Pretty much." He said, matter-of-factly.

"Tell me about you and Sakuno-chan." I figured it was okay too.

"What do you want to know?"

"Why'd you guys break up?"

I was wrapping his hand with bandages. It was a while before he answered, I almost thought he wouldn't.

"What do you think?" he asked back.

"How should I know?" I pouted at him.

He smiled weakly, "You should at least have a guess, right?"

"Sure." I scratched my cheek to arrange my thoughts.

"So this is what I think…" I started, "You and Sakuno-chan broke up-"

"And?" he prodded.

"And then… Well, Tomo-chan told me that Momo-senpai was the ex-captain of the tennis club. And the way he talks about you, well, I figured you guys know each other. Former teammates?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"And after a while, they got together. But maybe you were still trying to get her back, you know, so now, you don't like him." I finished. I also finished the bandages on his right hand, he handed me the left which didn't look as sore as the right.

"Interesting theory." He commented while nodding.

"So I got it right?"

"You missed some points."

"Which ones?"

He took a deep breath and sighed. He couldn't seem to get himself to start telling his story so I repeated my theory,

"So you guys broke up-" I recalled.

"Obviously."

"And Momo-senpai, your former teammate-"

"He was also my best friend."

Wow. That added more drama to it. I gaped at him, absorbing the information.

"Since middleschool." He added like it was nothing.

"Okay," I continued. "And after a while, they got together."

"No."

"Then, what?"

"They were together even before we broke up." He shrugged.

That momentarily rendered me speechless. I think my jaw dropped, pure shock etched on my face. And when I couldn't help it, I exclaimed,

"SHE CHEATED ON YOU?!" I imagined Sakuno's face, I couldn't believe it. Not the Sakuno I knew, surely. She couldn't hurt a fly even if she tried.

"But why?" I heard myself asking. He laughed at that.

"Maybe you should ask her." He suggested. But I couldn't imagine myself asking Sakuno and making her feel awkward.

"So _that's_ why you don't like Momo-senpai now."

"No, I hate him. I really, really hate him." He corrected, smiling at me. I finished with his hand.

"How'd you find out?" I asked sadly. This story actually got me down.

"Maybe they got tired of the lying and hiding, so eventually, they decided to tell me."

I imagined that moment, when they told him. I wondered what had turned out. I motioned for him to lean in so I could start cleaning the cuts on his face. He did. I touched the cut on his cheek with my fingers.

"It hurts?" I asked, dabbing at the bruise.

"No."

"How about finding out they were cheating on you? Did that hurt?" I thought out loud.

Immediately after I heard myself say it, I wish I hadn't. He didn't answer for a long time until I figured he would never answer. Of course, no one would like to admit people hurt them. Especially people they love and trust. And of course, it hurt. No need to answer that question. Of course it did.

To make up for it, I showed him the box of Band-Aids singing, "Te-den!"

"What the heck is that?" He asked, wide-eyed. Ha-ha! I managed to surprise him.

"It's called Band-Aids. Welcome to the 21st century!" I beamed.

"Pink?"

"Cute isn't it?"

He laughed as if he really couldn't believe it was happening.

"I could deal with the pinkness but… with baby blue dots?"

I took one off the box and gently patted it on his cheek. It was so cute I wanted to take a picture. So I decided that I would. He was holding the box of Band-Aids with a weird expression on his face. It was like he was telling the box _'why do you exist?' _I looked for my phone in my purse and told him not to move.

"You're actually going to take a picture? Rub salt to the wound?" He laughed, exasperated, leaning away from the camera.

"Yes, so please hold still." I begged.

"I would never trust you again." He said, but held still. He rolled his eyes, smiling and I took the picture. I laughed a triumphant laugh. Eventually, he laughed with me.

After I finished fixing his face up, we lie on the grass and drank champagne again. I looked at the stars and focused on a little one. I wished, for the first time in my life, for time to stand still.


	4. Chapter 3: Champagne, Kisses, & Other

**A/N:**

**Hi there, to those still reading this story! Thanks so much by the way. :)**

**Anyway, I know it's a little fast-paced but well... I'm planning for a lot to happen so I don't want to drag it out too long. for those who leave comments, it helps me get into the writing mood. :)**

** I love hearing from you guys.  
**

**Tata. Have fun. Hope you like it. :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own PoT (sucks for me! Haha!) :D**

**"Nothing safe is worth the drive~" (me, singing)**

* * *

**Chapter Three**

**Champagne, Kisses and Other Lovely Intoxications.**

10 pm.

"When was the first time you tasted champagne?" I asked, still lying on the grass.

"When I went to Europe. This old guy treated us to a fancy dinner. We were served champagne." He said, passing the bottle to me.

"You've been to Europe?!" I sat up in surprise. "My dream is to go to Europe."

"Why?"

"I wanna see the Eiffel Tower. Did you go see it?" I asked with enthusiasm. I was genuinely intrigued.

"Sure."

"What does it look like?" I took a swig and handed the bottle to him.

"It's okay, I guess."

"OKAY?!" I laughed out loud, couldn't believe what I've just heard. "Just OKAY? My dream destination isn't amazing, or beautiful, it's just _okay_?"

He shrugged – I was amazed by his ability to shrug even when lying down.

"I guess it _is_ pretty from afar. So if you ever go there, look at it from a faraway building. Up close, it's just steel. It's actually ugly up close."

My jaw dropped. "No way!"

"Everything's uglier up close."

I didn't believe in that. Some things are even prettier up close – like his eyes. But of course, I didn't tell him _that_.

"You're crazy." I shook my head and lay down on my back again. "Where else have you been?'

He thought about it for a minute. Then said, "Australia."

"How about Australia, what's it like?"

"It's okay, I guess." Then he laughed.

"That's it. You're a terrible travel companion."

He laughed harder. Then he stopped and explained,

"I'm not saying they aren't beautiful. 'Cause they are. It's just that… not one is prettier than the other, you know? It's like they're all the same. Same level of beauty."

I still didn't get it so he continued.

"Like when I was walking on the streets of Paris one night, I really thought it was pretty amazing. And then I went back to Japan and was strolling one night and I thought: _hey,_ _this place is pretty amazing too_. I've just never noticed. It was like Paris. Or Paris is like Tokyo. "

"I still want to go to Paris." I said like it mattered. "And see the Eiffel Tower."

He just smiled.

"Don't you think the Eiffel Tower looks kind of lonely?" I added.

He stopped and thought about it for a second.

"I didn't realize it had the ability to feel." He answered with a chuckle.

"Whatever. It looks pretty lonely to me. That's why I want to go and see it!"

"You're drunk."

11 pm.

"It's almost empty." I complained, giving the bottle to him.

"Don't you think we've had enough?" He asked.

"But it tastes so good. I should have bought two bottles."

"That's it!" He sat up and drank all that was remaining until there was no more.

"You drank it all!" I sat up, incredulous.

"You're drunk."

"No, I'm not." And I wasn't - just a little light-headed, sure, but not drunk.

"It's late. I should take you home."

"You can't seriously be thinking of driving, right?" I raised a brow at him.

He gave me a look that clearly said, _'what are you talking about? I'm not drunk'_.

"You may not be drunk but you've still had alcohol!" I pressed.

"Champagne is barely alcohol." He replied.

"That's what all alcoholics say at first."

And we laughed.

Midnight.

"So now what?" He sighed.

We were still sitting there, unable to decide the best way to get home. He was insisting on driving his bike and I was intent on not letting that happen - I still wanted to continue living.

"I swear I can drive you home safely." He stood up, playing with his keys on a finger. He walks in a straight line. "See, I'm not the least bit drunk."

I stood up too but felt woozy. I swayed to one side - surprised and hoping I regain my balance – until he caught my arm and steadied me. He laughed out loud and then shook his head.

"Oops." I smiled at him.

"You. Are. Drunk." He pointed out. I rolled my eyes at him and then suddenly, he kissed me!

It was soft of a fast, gentle kiss. I didn't even think, didn't even realize it until it was over. And then, we stood still and stared at each other, reading each other's expressions, clearly thinking: _'what had just happened?'_ That's when I suddenly laughed! I laughed out loud and he just stood there, watching me. I didn't know why I giggled like a psycho but I just wanted to laugh - so I did. Maybe I _was_ drunk. But it lessened the tension in the air anyway. He probably found me funny and eventually, he laughed too.

"I told you, you shouldn't drive. You. Are. Drunk!" I told him.

In the end, we decided to take a cab. It will stop at my house first and then, at his. He waved goodbye as I entered the front door. I waved back. We didn't talk about the kiss. I went to my room and collapsed at my bed, realizing I was still wearing his gray hoodie. I told myself I'll figure out everything that has happened in the morning. I dozed off.

But ever since then, every time I'd drink champagne, I'd remember Ryoma and my first kiss - the kiss that tasted as sweet as champagne.

The morning after. It was a Sunday – plenty of time to figure things out without Ryoma around. I woke up around noon and still felt dead tired. The memory of the night before was pretty hazy in my mind. I decided to stay in bed all day, staring at the ceiling, wearing his hoodie.

Twin One: Now what?

Twin Two: What do you mean _what_?

Twin One: It doesn't mean we're a couple right?

Twin Two: No.

Twin One: So what did the kiss mean?

Twin Two: Nothing, I guess.

Twin One: _Nothing?!_

Twin Two: Why don't you ask him tomorrow?

Twin One: Yeah. You're right, I will. I'll ask him now! Let's call him!

Twin Two: Uh. You don't have his number.

Twin One: Oh yeah, that sucks! How come we've kissed and I don't even have his number?!

Eventually, my thirst pulled me out of the bed. I went downstairs, no one was home. Nothing new about that so, I went to the kitchen and drank water and ate cereal. I forced myself not to think about anything, specifically the kiss, because I figured it'd drive me nuts. I washed up, got dressed, watched a senseless cartoon, and just tried not to think. But I couldn't get it out of my head! My mind would eventually drift back to what happened.

Twin One: Maybe it _was _nothing. Just an impulsive kiss.

Twin Two: Then, why does that make you feel sad?

I wasn't even vaguely aware of the doorbell ringing until the fourth buzz. I wanted to just ignore it because I was in a sulking mood but I forced myself to get up and open it.

"Hey." Ryoma smiled, standing by the gate. "What took you so long?"

And suddenly, I wasn't ready to see him. My stomach felt weird with nervousness and I could only imagine how flushed my face looked like. _Thank God, I washed up._ I forced a smile and walked up to the gate. I told myself that just the night before, I was confident and calm around him. I forced myself to think of happy thoughts but all I could think of was the kiss.

"Why are you-" I started.

"Visiting." He answered my unfinished question, still smiling. He was still bruised-faced but still awfully cute too. And he was using the Band-Aid I bought for him! I figured that maybe he hadn't had the time to buy a new box of Band-Aids yet.

_He's in a good mood_, I thought. And I just stood there, thinking if I was imagining that he was there after all. After a while, he said,

"So," he looked at me funny. "can I come in?"

My senses woke up. "Uh. Yeah." I said and opened the gate. I lead him inside the house.

"Where's everyone?" he asked.

"No one's home but me." I shrugged. "My parents are both at work."

"On a Sunday?" He asked, taking off his sneakers.

"Yep." I answered, getting used to his presence already.

"And here I was ready to meet them and be at my best behavior."

He sat by the sofa and smiled at what I was watching – the senseless cartoon. I was so embarrassed I cursed myself for not changing the darn channel.

"What do you want to drink?" I asked, already by the kitchen. To my surprise, he got up and followed me to the kitchen.

"Anything." He held up a grocery bag, "I bought snacks."

I handed him a bowl for the chips and a plate for the moon cakes.

As I was making orange juice, I kept thinking how weird it was with him around the house, helping me around in the kitchen. I couldn't help but smile to myself.

Twin One: Maybe it wasn't _nothing_ after all.

Twin Two: Nah, maybe he just came here to put you to place and tell you it _was _nothing and that he's sorry.

Twin One: I'm gonna strangle you.

We brought the food back to the living room and placed it by the center table. I sat on the floor as I was always used to doing and he did too. I focused my eyes on the classic cartoon about a cat and a mouse and quietly drank juice. They did something funny and I couldn't help but laugh. Ryoma laughed beside me too. And just like that I felt comfortable around him again.

"That's so stupid!" I exclaimed, talking about the scene and laughing at the same time.

I looked at him, he was still laughing, his head thrown back.

"When is this cat going to catch this mouse? I've spent my whole childhood waiting for that to happen." He said after a while.

"Oh really, you used to watch this? Me too!"

"I think every kid watched this." He said, biting a moon cake.

"I didn't think you were that type of kid – the one who watched cartoons." I admitted.

"Really? Why?" He asked, genuinely curious.

"I thought you'd be out playing tennis all of the time."

"Nah, I was a kid. I wasn't _that_ passionate about tennis back then. I'd rather lie around and watch cartoons all day."

"Then, how'd you get good at tennis?"

"My old man would ask me to play with him." He started to explain, "I was a kid so naturally I'd want to spend time with my dad, right? And that was what we always did – play tennis. He didn't tell me he wanted me to get serious about tennis or anything, he'd make it seem like we were just playing. It was just a game." He shrugged.

"Your parents really _are_ pretty clever." I commented, thinking about the genius of it all.

"I used to play tennis." I blurted out.

"Really?" He asked, surprised.

"Yeah. In grade school. I hated it."

We laughed.

"I'd rather read a book you know, I'm pretty lazy." I explained.

"You do look like the type." He admitted. I punched his arm.

"My dad really wanted me to get into sports. And I was pretty eager on not letting that happen. Maybe I would've liked it if he were actually there to play with me – like your dad was."

He didn't say anything, just continued eating moon cake, and I quickly added,

"Not that I have a problem with him or anything."

Because I really didn't. My dad was just like that: always busy, always away for work. I've learned to accept him a _long_ time ago.

"What about your mom?" he inquired. "What's she like?"

"She's okay. She helps dad around so she's often with him but when she's around, she's pretty mom-like."

He nodded. There was a sudden lull in the conversation, which he didn't seem to mind. We watched the cartoon and ate.

"Hey, Ryoma-kun?"

"Hm?"

"What's your favorite color?" I asked just to keep him talking.

"I really don't have one."

"You're boring." I scowled.

"What about you? Do _you_ have a favorite color?"

"Of course, but it keeps on changing from time to time."

"What about right now? What's your favorite color?"

"Green." I answered without thinking.

"Why?" he asked.

I wanted to say, _because it's the color of the bottle of champagne_, but I didn't. Instead, I said,

"No reason. I just like green right now."

"What about me, do you like me right now?" And he moved to face me like he was really curious to hear the answer. I hate it when he does that – he puts me on the spot and gives me this innocent look. It irritates me all the time.

_Why is it like this with him?_ I thought. _One moment he's really adorable and the next moment, I really hate him._

"Why'd you kiss me?" I snapped.

"Hmm." He answered safely. Definitely not the answer I wanted to hear.

"Fine. Maybe it was just the alcohol taking over." I replied. And suddenly, the getting drunk bit which was so funny to us the previous night, didn't seem funny at all.

"Are you upset?" He asked, surprised.

I sighed and lied, "No."

"Then, why are you doing that? Huffing and puffing?" He innocently pointed out.

"Because I can't figure you out!" I snapped back.

He went quiet but he was still watching me. I watched TV. The silence was deafening.

"Ryoma-kun, why are you really here?" I sighed.

"Hmm." He replied safely yet again. And just like that, my temper rose again.

"Why are you like that?" I snapped and faced him forcefully.

"What? I'm thinking!" He explained.

"You can't _not_ have a clear reason!"

"Why not?! Maybe it's just like why you like the color Green. Maybe I just like doing things for no reason." And now, he was really irritated at me. And vice versa.

I wanted to tell him, _but there is a reason! I just didn't want to admit it to you_! when I figured that maybe, he had his reasons to - that he just didn't want to tell me.I wished he would though.

"Fine." I huffed.

"Fine." He turned away and focused on the TV.

I stuffed a moon cake defiantly in my mouth.

"That's it?" He asked after a while, still a bit irate.

"What do you mean?" I replied with the same level of irritability.

"I asked you if you like me."

"Yes, I like you, what about it?"

"Aren't you going to ask the obvious question?" He turned to me, all serious.

"What obvious question?" I temporarily forgot that I was pissed off at him because I was wondering what the heck he was talking about.

"You're asking me all these questions, looking for so many reasons - all the why's. Why did I kiss you? Why am I here? But aren't you going to ask me if I like you back?" He finished, scowling, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Wha-"

"I asked you if you like me. Why couldn't you just have asked me the same question - the question I have a clear answer to." He retorted, clearly ticked, stuffing his mouth defiantly with a moon cake just like I did.

"Okay, so do you like me back?" I asked in a teensy-tiny voice and with an idiotic smile plastered in my face.

"Yes! Isn't that all that matters?!" He rolled his eyes.

And like I always do around him, I laughed. I laughed until I had tears in my eyes. He just looked at me, clearly still irritated. But I found it all so amusing. I wished he'd laugh with me.

He sighed. "What's so-"

"I can't believe you're confessing to me angrily? Isn't that weird? You're telling me you like me while you're pissed at me?"

He thought about that and then rolled his eyes, but at least he was smiling.

"I can't figure _you_ out." He admitted, shaking his head and hanging it in a defeated way.

I patted him on the back, "That's the whole point." I joked. And then added nonchalantly,

"So we like each other? Does that mean we're a couple now?"

He shrugged and said, "Hmm." And then he laughed, remembering that answer was the reason we fought in the first place. I pouted at him.

"What do you think?" he offered. "Are you not tired of fighting with me yet?"

"No." I beamed.

"Okay then." He shrugged and ate another piece of moon cake.

And just like that we became a couple. We watched TV and bickered about petty things like which channel to tune in to, or who should get up and serve more juice. And then, we'd laugh at each other. We didn't kiss or hold hands or did anything sweet, we just sat there and let the day pass until he said goodbye at around 7 pm and patted me on the head like I was a pet. But it didn't matter. There were plenty of time for romance, it was only the beginning. I felt so giddy and happy for the rest of the day. And this time I made sure I had his number.

Monday morning, something peculiar happened – I got to school early! I took my time in front on my locker – something I could never afford to do whenever I'm running late – and wondered if Ryoma had already arrived and was comfortably yawning on his seat upstairs. It seemed like that wasn't the case because when I caught a glimpse outside, there he was, yawning and strolling towards the entrance. Our eyes met. I smiled. He smiled back and made his way towards his locker. I thought, _Now what? _Since I have never had a boyfriend before, I didn't know what to do next. Should I go over his locker and wait for him? Or should we do what we always do and go separately?

I was still in the middle of deciding when he pops up beside my locker. I jumped a bit, startled.

"Ohayou, Toru-chan." He said cheerfully. I noted the cute Band-Aid on his cheek, it seemed like he decided it'd be a waste not to use it after all.

"Uh, Hi." I smiled and waved and started to arrange notebooks inside my locker by height – something I have never bothered to do.

"You're early, which is weird. I wonder why." He leaned sideways against the locker besides mine.

"I decided to organize my locker." I lied.

"Interesting." He replied, obviously not buying it.

A minute passed by with him just leaning there watching me and me arranging things randomly inside my locker. He sighed loudly afterwards. I stopped and looked at him.

"What?" I asked him.

"I'm already bored."

"And?"

"Organizing your locker is taking an awfully long time." He pointed out.

"So?"

"Do you plan on making me stand here, waiting for you, forever? We're going to be late." He said, already turning towards the stairs.

I laughed, cursing myself for not realizing he came over to wait for me. I slammed my locker shut and ran to him.

"Hold on!" I said, catching up to him, a goofy smile plastered on my face.

"I'm never waiting for you whenever you decide to _organize_ your locker again." He teased, rolling his eyes at me and smiling that smile I liked the most. I just shrugged and gave him a big smile myself.

And then, in a whim, he took my hand and laced his fingers with mine like it was already a habit of his - like he had been holding my hand for years. And as we walked towards the classroom, I wished for each corridor to be a mile longer. Holding hands feels as good as kissing is what I've learned that day.

Despite my whole-hearted wishing, we eventually arrived at the classroom, and I swear there was a collective gasp that Ryoma didn't appear to have heard. Once again, I felt conscious as we crossed the room and walked towards our seats with our classmates' heads turning and eyes watching us. We took our seats. He let go of my hand and stretched, oblivious to the eyes still watching us.

_And now, it's official._ I thought to myself, thinking how there was no better way of announcing ourselves being a couple to everyone besides that. Oddly, I felt an overwhelming feeling - I guess you can call it pressure. I felt like I had to prove to everyone why I deserved to be there, on that spot beside him. Why I deserved to be his girlfriend. It was so overwhelming, I almost hyperventilated. _Almost._

"Don't think too much." Ryoma said suddenly, like he knew how weird I was feeling.

I smiled shyly, almost apologetically, at him and he gently tapped my head once. I wondered if I already seemed transparent to him – if whenever he looks at me he already sees what goes on inside my head. And then, I remembered him saying how he couldn't figure me out.

I looked at Tomo-chan's seat first, she gave me a smile which seemed to say _well, if you can't help it _and then, she gave me a little wave. I flashed her a big smile, thankful for her approval. The Ryoma Echizen's fan club president is my friend, that should gain some points right? And then, I looked over at Sakuno's seat, she saw me and smiled shyly, probably still remembering the fight between my boyfriend and hers. But it didn't matter, I wanted to tell her. So I smiled what I hoped was a reassuring smile. I remembered her hugging me and telling me that I could make Ryoma happy. I wished she was right. And I was also wishing for the two of them – okay, and maybe Momo-senpai too – to be okay. I already didn't care at how things played out between the three of them. I wasn't there; I didn't have the right to judge or to conclude. I just wished for everything to be okay so I can be Ryoma's girlfriend and Sakuno's friend at the same time.

It seemed like I was suddenly having more and more wishes with each passing minute!

"Ne, Ryoma-kun" I poked his arm and he turned his head in my direction.

"What?"

I went ahead and just asked it, "Does it bother you that Sakuno-chan is my friend?"

He looked caught off-guard at first but he quickly recovered.

"Hmm." He looked up, thinking. I pouted at him and that made him smile.

"Why is that important?" He asked too innocently.

"It's important for me to know."

And then, he turned serious. "Why? What will happen if ever I tell you that it does bother me?"

I thought about it. _What would I do about it if he does say that?_

"I don't know. I'd probably still be her friend."

"Then it doesn't matter what I think right?" He concluded. But he had this unfathomable expression which had me guessing if he was upset or if he was okay. I really hate it when he does that.

"I still want to know." I pressed on.

"Let me think about it." He answered which I knew meant he'd dodge the question as long as he could.

I smiled almost too sweetly and said, "Fine. We'll talk about it _later_." Determined to keep pestering him about it until he provides an answer.

Sensei arrived. He seemed surprised to see me on time for a change because he smiled brightly at my direction. He probably thought the reason for my change was an interest on his subject which was Literature and even though I've always loved Literature, sadly, that wasn't the case. But he didn't know that, so at least I've made him happy. He asked everyone to settle down.

Sensei seemed excited to tell us something that morning. As soon as the class settled down, he threw his arms opened and announced loudly and joyfully to the class.

"Play Month!"

Which was met by groans and sighs. I looked around to see sagging faces. I turned to Ryoma and whispered,

"Play Month? Do we get to play the whole month? Isn't that a good thing?"

Even Ryoma looked like this information got him in a bad mood.

"He does this every year." He told me, shaking his head. "He'd make all the classes he teach stage a play and ask the whole school to watch."

"What!?" Oh no, I hate spotlights.

"Yeah, last year it was Romeo and Juliet. It was horrible." He shuddered.

I laughed silently. "I bet you were Romeo." It was obvious. Make the most popular person star on the play and it'll surely be watched by everyone.

"No." He poked his tongue at me and I was surprised that my suspicions were wrong. But then he admitted,

"I backed out early on, telling him I had an important tennis match. I tell him that lie every year just to get out of it. He always tries to push me into a role."

"But of course." I told him, giggling.

"Well, it's never going to happen."

Sensei clapped his hands to get everyone's attention again. He was unfazed by the uproar.

He cleared his throat and continued, "This year, we'd go for a crowd favorite. An English classic! Any idea what I have in mind?" He asked enthusiastically.

"Alice In Wonderland. Seniors always do Alice in Wonderland." Tomoka answered dryly, like everyone knew exactly what it was.

Sensei beamed and said, "Yes! Correct! Now we'll start casting!" Everyone groaned again, knowing they wouldn't be able to stop this. Sensei looked around,

"Echizen! What about playing the Cheshire cat?" He asked Ryoma, who gave me a look that seemed to say _'See what I mean?'_ I had to suppress a laugh.

"I'd love to, Sensei!" Ryoma quickly responded with a smile almost too kind to be real, "But I have this important match coming. I'd be busy with training."

Everyone laughed quietly, like they've seen this rally between these two happen too many times.

Sensei sighed but he still had a smile. _He's an interesting teacher_, I thought.

"Oh well, it can't be helped then." Sensei shrugged.

"I'll help with the props, Sensei. That doesn't take too much time." Ryoma offered.

Sensei smiled at him genuinely, "Sure, Echizen. I'm glad you still want to be part of this even with your busy schedule."

"Of course, Sensei."

And the matter was settled.

"Happens all the time." Ryoma told me.

"You're such a cheater! Props? That's the easiest job! And you made it appear like you were doing_ Sensei_ a favor." I accused him.

"Hey, it's not that easy. I've been doing it for years." He retorted with a laugh.

"Poor Sensei." I pouted at him.

He shrugged and said, "Hey, I feel bad for Sensei but not bad enough to dress up as a cat in front of everyone."

I laughed and realized that this was one of the perks Ryoma gets for being a popular athlete. He can claim he's always busy when he doesn't want to do stuff and no one counters him.

"Anyway," Sensei continued. "Let's focus on the lead role - Alice. Who wants to play the role of Alice?"

Nobody answered. Sensei was unfazed, and suddenly he looked at me and I knew I was in trouble.

_Oh no!_ I heard myself thinking as Sensei opened his mouth. I knew right then it was a mistake to come to class early that day.

"How about Toru-san? It fits perfectly, don't you think?" He beamed and I blamed my parents for naming me Alice. Every eye was on me.

"Uh." I said, stalling for time. I gave Ryoma a look which said _'Help!' _and he gave me this look which said _'Just do what I did.' _But I couldn't because I was a terrible liar, especially if everyone was watching. And I hated letting people down, specially as I already felt bad for Sensei. But I also hated spotlights. That's why I never joined a school production! I hated attention. I have a severe case of stage fright.

"I don't think I can do it, Sensei." I admitted.

"Of course you can, we'll all help you!" He proudly said and everyone looked away. The message was clear – I'd be on my own here.

"It'd really make me happy." Sensei remarked whole-heartedly and I couldn't get myself to lie to him.

"Uh." Was all I could say.

"It's settled then!" Sensei beamed and wrote my name on the board in big bold letters.

I looked at Ryoma, he was suppressing a laugh. I slapped his arm and glared at him.

He let out the laughter he'd been holding back and afterwards sighed,

"You're too kind, Alice-chan." He said, slowly shaking his head.

I covered my face with my hands in dismay. I had just been given the scariest news I've had in my life and my boyfriend was finding it very funny. Sigh. I wanted to jump into down a rabbit-hole to a different world - away from SeiGaku – just like what happened to my namesake and her stupid wonderland.


	5. Chapter 4: Rainbows and Shotgun

**A/N**

**Hello and thanks to those who continue to support this story!**

**By the way, thank you for the faves and comments, it really encourages me to go on with the story. Sorry it took me so long to update. You know, life and everything kind of made me busy but here it is (finally).**

**OH! And most importantly, I've only noticed recently that the asterisk/star signs (***) I've been putting on the story to signify a turn of events don't show whenever I publish it. So the story suddenly jumps to the next scene without any preamble. Have you guys noticed? I don't know if anyone even noticed so please tell me if you did because I will edit the previous chapters. If it wasn't such a bother, on the other hand, then I won't bother editing it too. (Lazy bastard.) Haha.**

**Anyway, here it is. :**

**Disclaimer: I do not own PoT – and the fact pains me. :D**

* * *

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**Rainbows And Shotgun**

And so, Play Month it was. If I weren't too busy being nervous about playing the lead role, it'd probably be fun. All senior students joined together for Alice In Wonderland and I got to meet the students from other classes. Tomoka was even more energetic with Horio-kun around and they were kind of fun to watch – they were a tag team, a comic duo, not one without the other – the naturalness of their togetherness made me envious. Other teachers also gave us an easy time because they agreed that the play was an important tradition. The school was buzzing with activities that were different from most days. We had time and permission to use it as we please - we just had to make sure we get to actually stage the play.

One thing about Play Month I didn't like though (aside from the obvious) was that it took my time away from Ryoma, which sucked because it was the early stage of our couple-dom and we should be together all of the time. But we worked separately. He was the head of props and stage design (which he claimed he had mastered by then) and could usually be found on the school grounds bossing artists and go-to guys to paint whatever needs painting or hammer whatever needs hammering. Meanwhile, I was always inside one of the classroom where peace and quiet was needed so that the actors could memorize their lines and rehearse them properly. Tomo-chan was our director (which she claimed had always been her job since Sensei first surprised them with Play Month and just like Ryoma, she also claimed that she had quite mastered this job already). Tomo-chan wouldn't let anyone who weren't actors inside without any valid reason, and I could say that she was pretty effective. Horio-kun was her right-hand, and also some sort of scriptwriter.

I get to spend some time with Ryoma in the morning (I'm almost always early now!) by the lockers before we need to do whatever we need to do for the day. We'll talk about how everything was going and we'll wish each other goodluck as we part. And then, we spend time when we pass each other by the hallways but we're always in a hurry so mostly, he'd only have time to tousle my hair (which I always tell him to stop doing but he does still). And then we'd eat lunch together but we'd both be so tired and thinking about all that was left to do for the day so we really just rest. And then, we'd go home together and this should be the time where we could enjoy and do whatever fun things we'd like. But still, most of the time, he'd be too exhausted from all the physical work he exerted and he'd still have to go on this training (he didn't have an important match coming though. He's just used to training because he says if he stops playing tennis and only train whenever a match is up, his skills will rust. So it's like part of his routine. "So I only said half a lie to Sensei," he even beamed proudly.) I, on the other hand, would be home busying myself with memorizing my lines.

Half a month passed and the play was half-ready too. One day, Tomo-chan let us have an early break and I immediately went outside the building, into the back, to look for Ryoma. I was used to looking for him by now and could easily spot him anywhere. I found him under a tree painting a_ tree_ on a piece of cardboard along with his team. He was concentrating so hard on what he was doing, I decided to just stay on where I was standing and watch him. But after a while of enjoying myself, a girl classmate of ours, who was also painting along with Ryoma, saw me and announced in a moderate voice, 'We have a visitor for Ryoma-kun' and all heads turned towards me. I waved hello to everyone and they smiled and nodded back before resuming their work. Ryoma looked up from what he was doing, poked his tongue out at me, and went back to painting. I walked over to him.

"So, how is _the love of my life_ doing?" I asked sweetly, out of hearing distance from anyone else. We were used to joking with each other by now and our latest conquest was giving each other hideous couple pet names.

"I don't know. How is he?" he said without looking up.

I sat beside him. "But _you_ should know, since you _are_ the lurve of my life."

"Well, you can find someone else because I will never answer if you seriously call me _that_."

"You're hurting my feelings here, cupcake."

He laughed at that. I'm pretty proud of the fact that I'm one of the people who can easily make him smile and laugh.

"What about you? What is _the reason of my existence_ doing here when I thought she'd be busy being bossed around by Tomo-chan?"

He stopped painting like I knew he would - because by then, I've already noticed how he can't seem to talk properly to someone without focusing on whoever he's talking to. He'd always stop whatever he's doing and just look at you, and I love this about him because it makes you feel like you're the center of his world for that moment.

"_The reason of your existence_ was given an early break and she decided to visit _the love of her life._" I explained. "Is _the reason of your existence_ being a bother?"

He acted like he was really thinking about it and then said, "Nah, she can stay if she wants, if she promises to help me paint." He handed me a brush. And so, we painted.

Minutes passed and I noticed how awfully quiet he seemed to be (or maybe it's because he was concentrating on the painting) so I asked him if anything was wrong. He shook his head in response and I asked him why he was so quiet and he looked at me like '_What are you talking about? '. _So I dropped it and just let him be. After about an hour, I got up and told him I needed to go back. He asked me if I needed him to walk me over and I said no, I could handle it. And we waved each other goodbye.

I was on the stairways when three girls stopped in front of me. By the looks of it, they were younger than I was. I didn't mind them at first but when I tried to walk around them, they blocked me again, and so I had to give them the _'What the hell are you doing?' _look.

"So, you're Toru-san?" The girl with the fake blonde hair smirked and the other two snickered. She was obviously their leader. And based on the tone of her voice, I assumed she wasn't trying to be friends.

"Yeah, that's me." I said, trying to walk past them again but again, they blocked my way. I threw my hands in the air in frustration.

"Do you guys need anything?" I sighed.

"Yes," the fake blonde spoke up again, "We want to know why you're with our prince!"

"Prince?" I asked.

"Yes, Prince Ryoma-kun!" the other girl, with the red highlights, said and I had to laugh.

"Prince Ryoma?!" I laughed harder thinking how Ryoma hated the mushy nicknames I made for him.

"What's so funny?!" The fake blonde demanded.

"Nothing." I snickered. "Just can't believe you call him your prince."

"And we can't believe he's with you." The third girl said. Let's refer to her as the girl with blue highlights.

_Ow. That hurt._ I knew these girls were probably just jealous and I knew a lot of people hated my guts here but this was my first face-to-face encounter with them and hearing the actual words really hurt.

"Better believe it then." I said like a real smartass.

They gave me a couple more smirks before walking around me and I kept wishing for Ryoma to appear and come save me from them like in the movies. But this wasn't a movie and Ryoma wouldn't come save me because he was busy painting a darn tree.

The fake blonde scanned me from head to foot before she left and then said, "Well, have your fun. It's not going to last."

And red highlights also had parting words. She said "I can't believe he'd stoop so low. His heart must've really been broken by Ryuzaki-san. He's just using you to get over her."

And, of course, blue highlights wouldn't let her friends have all the fun. "We all know he's still hung up on her. And we can't blame him. At least she has some class. And she's pretty."

They flicked their multi-colored hairs at me and left. I tried not to let it get to me but failed. So I went back to the classroom, miserable. Sakuno-chan greeted me cheerfully with the costume she was making (she was head of costume design, always had been). I looked at her. She _is_ pretty and I know she is nice. And she's so good at girl stuff like cooking and sewing – so unlike me. She also plays tennis – maybe she and Ryoma used to play together for fun – and I didn't. I told myself it didn't matter. I should stop thinking about it. But the other part of me – the cynical part – wondered what Ryoma ever saw in me.

#

Ryoma and I were at the rooftop for lunch. Ryoma always had big _bentos _made by his mom and I always bought something from wherever, that day I was having fast-food burger. He noticed this and said,

"You should really stop that."

I took a bite off my burger and said, "What'd you mean?"

"You can't live on fast-food forever."

"I don't always eat fast-food. Sometimes, it's convenience-store food." I joked but he didn't find it funny.

He grabbed my burger and immediately put it in his mouth. This surprised me, of course.

"HEY! Why are you stealing my lunch?!"

He shoved his bento at me. "Exchange." He said, already chewing some of my burger.

"What? But this is yours. Give me my burger back."

"No."

"But your mom made it for you!"

"Just eat it." He sighed dramatically like I was the one being unreasonable.

I picked the lunchbox up and ate a shrimp. It tasted awesome, as I expected. His lunches always look pretty good to me.

"Your mom is amazing." I commented, eating some more. By now, I've learned that his mom is a lawyer but if I hadn't known I would've guessed her as a chef.

He said nothing and just kept eating my burger.

"Say, Ryoma-kun. Why did you choose me?" I suddenly asked. I was trying to be as normal as I possibly could but I couldn't shake the mean girls' comments out of my thoughts. And then, here he was, being all caring - in his own way - for me and I wondered why again.

"What?" he scowled.

"Why me? What'd you see in me? Why not some other girl?"

And he looked at me, suspicious. As if, he were waiting for me to tell him I was joking. But I wasn't joking. And when he realized that, he scowled some more.

"Why are you asking me that?"

"I'm just curious."

"Okay, so out of every other guy, why'd you pick me?"

"Not fair! I asked first!"

"But can you actually _answer_ that question?"

"Yes, I actually could." I immediately replied even if I hadn't thought about it. I just wanted him to answer _my_ question.

"Fine." He sighed and thought about it for a while. Then he asked, "Is this really important? This question. So important to you that you won't allow me to avoid answering forever?"

"Yeah. So you'll have to think of something."

"Fine. You're cute."

"A lot of other girls are cute." I pouted.

"And you're interesting."

"So are a lot of other cute girls."

"Then, I'm never going to win, am I?" He said in an irritated tone.

I didn't say anything. So, for a few seconds, there was this deafening silence between us.

But then he suddenly said,

"Okay, how about this: I like the way you look wearing my hoodie."

I was too caught off-guard to answer immediately.

"And you were really cute when you got scared about my motorbike."

And then, he started counting off his fingers.

"You're also really cute when you're shy but trying hard not to show it. And you make me laugh in a weird way. And I like how you vaguely smell like strawberries. And that you' have just the right amount of weirdness in you. "

He paused, and the started again like he was getting really into it.

"And yeah, your hands are really small. And when you punch my arm, it doesn't hurt at all. I should know because you always do that to me. Do you ever notice that? You hit me when you're laughing at something I said, you hit me when you want my full attention, you hit me even when I have no idea why. You hit me _all _the time. You love hitting people – or boyfriends. I find it oddly adorable. I swear to God I'm crazy."

He looked at me and of course, I was blushing furiously.

"And you ask me weird questions and blush like a tomato." He said.

I laughed and said in a little voice. "Sorry about that."

He slapped my forehead with his palm. "What's gotten into you?"

I breathed loudly through my nose. Then did it again. He copied what I did and I started chuckling.

"Okay," I conceded, "I met some haters earlier."

"Haters?"

"Well, fans of yours actually."

He raised both his eyebrows and I didn't know if that meant he was surprised or that he was expecting it.

"What'd they look like?"

"One was blonde, fake though. The other had red highlights…"

"Oh. The Rainbow Scouts." He said even before I finished describing.

"They have a name?!" I snickered. The Rainbow Scouts? Really? In high school? _How lame is that?_

"Well, not really. It was Sakuno who named them that." He explained. Then must've realized he said something quite wrong. I didn't know how I felt about him talking about Sakuno-chan right then but I decided not to let it bother me. I was always asking him about her anyway and wanted them to get along, though I've given up on that thought.

"Really? But the girls said they like her." I shrugged. Seeing that I wasn't upset, he relaxed.

"No way. They hated her."

"But they told me she was pretty and has class."

"They didn't tell her_ that_ back when…" But he caught himself again and didn't finish the sentence. And he didn't have to finish it for me to realize that he was going to say _'back when we were together'_.

Then he sighed and said, "Look, it doesn't matter who it is. All that matters is that she is somewhat close to me, and then they'll devote themselves into hating her. That's what they do. That's just the way they are, Alice. And you'll only be wasting if you let them get to you. So just let them be and ignore it."

"Is that what Sakuno-chan did? Ignore them?" I asked and he had this brief moment of looking like he'd rather not answer my question. And then, I guess he'd finally accepted that his girlfriend has this complex on his ex so he gave up resisting my probing.

"No. She aimed a spray-paint at them and said that if they ever bother her again or even if she just sees a wrong look from them, she'd spray-paint their hair maroon."

I had to laugh as I imagined that scene. I'd say she handled it well. _That's our Sakuno-chan!_

"That's brilliant!" I commented.

"They never bothered her again." He replied.

Days after that, Sakuno was fitting me the costume she made and making some adjustments when I decided to catch up with her. We hadn't been able to bond for a while because I always spent my free time with Ryoma-kun and I never sit with them at lunch anymore. Really, I wish they'd make up so we can all have lunch together.

"Sakuno-chan how have you been lately?" I started.

She was on her knees in front of me sewing the hem of my skirt. She kind of chuckled when I said that and replied with

"Why? Been missing me?"

"Of course, I have. I'm sorry I haven't been spending time with you and Tomo-chan lately. It's just, you know…"

She sighed but she had a smile. "It's okay. Girls need to look after their boyfriends." And then she laughed, "Tomo-chan's been spending much of her time with Horio-kun too. I guess, it's the senior blues, you know, with graduation months away. Everyone needs to use the time left to be with their loved ones."

"Momo-senpai's still in town, isn't he?"

"Yeah, but he's leaving next week. He won't even get to watch the play."

"Oh. I'm sorry." Was all I could say because really, was there anything else to say to that?

"That's just how it is with him." She explained.

"How is he, by the way?" I asked.

Sakuno sighed again, deeper than usual. "I don't know really, Alice-chan. He's sort of not speaking to me."

"Oh? But why? Is it because of the fight?" I asked, referring to that stupid fight he had with Ryoma-kun weeks ago.

"Partly, but not entirely. I don't know. I wish he'd talk to me properly before his flight though. What a waste, right? He had a month to spend here and we spend it fighting."

She kind of laughed a sad laugh.

"Oh, don't worry Sakuno-chan. Maybe he just needs time to sort out his thoughts. It'd turn out alright, you'll see." I said.

She looked up and gave me a smile. "You're right. Maybe he's just being a boy, right?"

And we laughed.

"Yeah.' I agreed. "Boys are weird."

#

"Are you nervous yet?" Ryoma asked at lunch break a day before the actual play. We had just finished eating and were just lying around in the grass under a tree.

"Very." I admitted. "I can hardly sleep since last week. I keep thinking about the play."

"Don't worry, you got your lines memorized down to perfection."

It was true. If I could just keep my cool, I might actually pull it off.

"I still can't help worrying." I sat up and skulked.

He sat up too and gave me a slow grin. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Why are you smiling like that?"

"Because…" He was smiling too happily.

"Because?"

"I have an idea - a great idea! And my old man lent me his car for today."

"What's that got to do with your great idea?"

"Everything!" He was being overly enthusiastic to the point that it was looking comedic. And I laughed, naturally.

"Okay, spill. What have you got on that head of yours?" I asked.

"Road trip!" He announced, throwing both of his arms on the air.

"Road trip?"

"Yeah. Where do you want to go?"

I stared at him for a moment, trying to decipher if he was joking or not. He didn't look like he was joking though but, well, I just couldn't take it seriously. And so, I said,

"You know we have Calculus later right? And after that we have to attend the final rehearsal for the play."

He sighed and shook his head but he was still smiling.

"Alice…" he started to say, "We've been studying calculus for how many weeks now? I've lost count. And next week, and next month, and the month after that, and all the days until graduation, we'll be attending that class."

"But…"

"And before we were even old enough to tie our shoelaces, we've been attending all sorts of classes. From today, and for many more days to come, we'd be attending more classes. But how many times have you been on a road trip with me?"

"…"

"Calculus can survive a day without us." He finished, and then he grinned from ear to ear again,

"So," he said, "where do you want to go?"

We were laughing in the car, ten minutes away from SeiGaku. I told him about how I rushed upstairs into the classroom to get my bag and told Tomo-chan I had to do something important, and he told me that he went to the performing arts theatre (where the props team were setting up the stage) to get his things and told his crew he was leaving everything up to them. That was it. No other explanations, no apologies. We just left. We knew it wasn't supposed to really be funny because in a way, we sort of abandoned some responsibilities and other people.

But it _was _funny simply because we were in a car, unsure where to go, when we're supposed to be sitting in Calculus. To me, it felt like, I broke some rules that day because I broke a routine. And I don't mean school rules – to me it felt so much more. I could've spent that day like any other day, but I didn't. We felt like we were totally in control of our lives and reckless at the same time.

"So where to?" he asked on the first crossroad we encountered. We were already caught in traffic but at least it gave me time to think.

"Please don't say the mall." He glanced my way as he said it.

"Of course not. Why will I want to go the mall when I can go anywhere?" I pinched his cheek, grinning.

"Exactly what I wanted to hear. Now where to?" And he revved the engine loudly and we laughed.

"Somewhere pretty but not too far from here."

"Pretty but not too far, huh?" I could tell he was already thinking of places inside is head.

"Anything around here like that?"

"All I can think of is the ocean."

"Perfect! Then, the ocean it is. To the ocean!"

He laughed and turned on the radio.

"The ocean it is!" He declared as the traffic light turned green and Hanson's _Penny and Me_ boomed from the radio.

Who knew sitting in the shotgun seat could give you intense happiness.

#

"Someone's in a good mood." I noted when we were driving along the freeway.

He looked at me and smiled from ear to ear and then said, "Oh? I wonder who that is."

"Why are you so jolly?"

"I'm always jolly."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am."

"Uh. No you're not."

And we went on like this for a while until I sighed deeply.

"C'mon, tell me! Why are you so happy today? You're so happy it's almost creepingly weird." I asked, poking his shoulder.

"I'm not even sure it's correct to say 'creepingly'." He replied, changing the topic. But I was determined to get the answers that I want from him.

"Whatever, Grammar Police. Why do you even have your dad's car?" I started my inquisition.

"Mom went to the hospital and my old man's attending something. He told me to pick mom up later since he won't be able to. So he lent me this car and he rode my motorbike instead."

"Oh. Is your mom okay?"

"Yeah. It's just a regular check-up. For work or something." He shrugged.

"Oh. So why are you so happy then?" I persisted and he laughed.

"We're still on to that? Maybe it's just because I get to drive the car and am now going to the ocean."

I wasn't quite convinced.

"What's so special with that? You get to go to all the trendiest places like Australia and Europe."

"Hmm? But maybe it's not the place but the company that makes it special." And he turned to me, stared and gave me this slow crooked smile which made me feel all nervous inside. I wondered if I'll ever get used to this effect he has on me.

"Eyes on the road! I don't want to die in a car accident!" I yelled at him and I reached to turn his face away from me –so that he won't notice me blush- and he just laughed.

#

"Are we there yet? I asked an hour into the drive.

"Have patience, grasshopper. Don't tell me you're already bored." He said.

I decided to open up a topic where he will be able to say a lot – tennis!

"Ne, Ryoma-kun. When you went to Europe, was it because of tennis?" I asked.

He nodded in response and I suddenly remembered Sakuno-chan and Momo-senpai and that they had to live miles away from each other because of tennis. I wondered if that would have to happen to us too.

"Was it because of a tournament?"

"Uh-huh." He nodded again.

"How long did you stay there?"

"Just about a month. Two weeks for the tournament and the first two weeks before that to settle in. Why?"

"Nothing." I shrugged. "Just curious. Did you win?"

"Yeah," he shrugged like it was nothing, "but it was only a friendly junior tournament."

"I can't tell if you're being modest or arrogant right now." I admitted with a laugh.

"Of course, I'm being modest. I'm the best tennis player ever, haven't you heard? I'm, like, the king of the world." He dead-panned and then, he laughed with me after.

After a while, I asked another question.

"So do you plan on going pro? After we graduate, I mean. You'll be eighteen then, you'll be eligible to join the major tournaments."

"Sure." He answered but in a tone that suggested he was not quite sure.

"So when we break up, can I keep your hoodie? I still have it."

He raised his eyebrows in that way he does when he's mildly caught off-guard.

"Depends. Why would we break up?" He asked.

"Because," I started to explain, matter-of-factly, "you'd surely go to a nice university somewhere, maybe in the US, where they'll give you a tennis scholarship. And then, you'd be so busy training for all the major tournaments and then, you'll meet lots of people there and have lots of success. And then, you'll win the Australian Open, then the French Open, then, Wimbledon, and lastly, the US Open. Then, you'll win these Opens many more times for many years. Then, you'll realize you're too good for me. You'll find me boring because I lived in Japan and will stay here all my life. And the, you'll probably get married to a supermodel or something."

What's weird with what I told him was that I really meant it when I said it. I really believed it would turn out like that. Except for the supermodel part, I'm not so sure about that but it's possible. I'm crazy, I must be.

He yawned, not taking me seriously. "Will our break-up be ugly? Like in the movies."

I chuckled at that. "Yeah, yeah it will. It'd be really ugly. I'll slap your face and yell at you and stuff."

"Then, you can keep the hoodie."

"Thanks."

"I still don't see why we have to break up though." He shrugged.

"If you're smart, you'd break up with me eventually and marry a supermodel." My turn to shrug.

"Well, it's great to hear about your positive outlook regarding the future of this relationship." He dead-panned.

I laughed half-heartedly and looked out the window.

That was when the song_ Wouldn't It Be Nice_ by the Beach Boys came up from the radio and he started singing along and tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

It started as a whisper and then, he sang louder and louder until he was singing on the top of his lungs and banging his head to a song which was not even metal!

I couldn't help but laugh (and it wasn't half-hearted this time!) It was_** really**_ funny.

"Make. It. Stop!" I yelled in between laughs, covering my ears.

He ignored me and just continued singing and swaying his head side by side.

_Maybe if we think and wish and hope and pray it might come true, rum-rum-ree-roo~_

(Yep, he even sang that part!)

_Baby, then there wouldn't be a single thing we couldn't doooo~_

_Oh we could be married,_

_And then we'd be happy,_

And he turned to me and I decided to sing along with him on the top of my lungs too-

_**Oh, wouldn't it be NICEEEE!**_

We chorused.

After the song finished, I was still almost in tears because of laughing uncontrollably. I couldn't get over it.

"You're still laughing? I'd get extra points in heaven because of making you too happy." He commented with a chuckle after half an hour.

"That was so… HAHAHA!"

He rolled his eyes at me but he was smiling. It was a different kind of smile- one I don't think I've seen him use before. Even his eyes were smiling, it was a pretty sight.

It made me stop laughing.

"What?" he asked surprised at my abrupt silence.

"You know, you're kind of…" I said slowly with a little smile of my own, "…pretty."

He laughed heartily and said, "I really should make you laugh more often. It makes me _pretty_ all of a sudden."

"I changed my mind," I butt in, "let's never break up."

He just kind of stared at me for a while with a little smile on his face,

"Okay." He said finally. I grinned.

And it was at that time when I felt like I had officially torn out my heart from my chest and handed it to him on a silver platter. There's no getting it back.

_I kind of love you_, I thought, telling him what I wanted to say –but only in my mind. It was too cheesy to utter and up to this day, I regret the fact that I didn't weave those thoughts into words at that time.

"Look ahead." He told me.

I did and I could see that the horizon was blue – almost as if the ocean were elevated instead of flat. I looked at him and he glanced my way and smiled my favorite smile,

"We're almost there." He declared.

I nodded, "Yes, we are."

I was looking ahead. And whatever lay there, it looked promising.

And we were moving forward, getting closer and closer to it.

We were almost there.

* * *

**Author:**

**I love riding shotgun too. I actually more than love it, if that makes sense. And I love that song by the Beach Boys so much. Thanks for the read! :3**


	6. Chapter 5: Not Raining Yet

**A/N:**

**Hi'ya! **

**It took me such a long time to add another chapter but it feels good to be back. It's just that I got caught up playing Harvest Moon again (kudos to my fellow HM fans!) and I also became quite busy and exhausted with life and other stuff.**

**And this is also the shortest chapter ever. HAHA. But anyway, I hope you still enjoy it. I really missed this story so I'll be updating it soon. It's not over yet. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own PoT. Sucks to be me, then. **

* * *

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**Not raining…yet.**

"And…. We're here!" he exclaimed as he turned off the ignition. "Looks like it'll rain."

I got out of the car and looked at the sky. Sure enough, dark clouds appeared on the horizon.

"Aww." I complained.

He patted my head, "It's not raining yet. So, let's go." He took my hand and led me to the railings. The ocean was magnificent, the breeze was soothing, and the smell was, well, ocean-y.

I started to wander around while Ryoma just stood there, looking at the ocean, thinking God-knows-what. I was a few feet away from him when I saw a bottle. There was a paper inside of it. I picked it up, spun around to tell Ryoma about it, and then I stopped- because Ryoma had his eyes closed and the breeze was making the moment look so cinematic.

It was as if I'd shatter the peace if I make even the slightest of movements.

He looked so calm and free of worries, I knew I captured that moment in my mind forever. I took a picture of him there using my eyes and tattooed it into my soul.

Then - he probably felt me staring - he opened his eyes and looked at me. And the moment was gone.

"What's that?" he asked with a smile.

I realized a bit late he was talking about the bottle. "Oh, this? I picked it up." I walked towards him and handed him the bottle.

"You think there's a message in that paper?" he positioned the bottle upside down and started shaking it.

I laughed, "We're like pirates."

"Searching for hidden treasure. And this could be the map." And he started tapping the bottle and whacking it on his palm. "But we can't get the map out of the bottle."

"Arggh, mate. Maybe the treasure's not for us." I said. He gave up on the bottle and handed it back to me.

And then, we just stood there for a while, looking at the ocean. Not saying anything, just absorbing the fact that the ocean is there and we're there and that the memory will probably last forever.

"Hey, this is a good idea." I said after a while.

"What is?" he asked.

"You know, this road trip thing. We should do it more often. Beats Calculus."

And then, I had this crazy idea. I turned to him quickly and grabbed his left hand with my right hand and put his right hand on my waist before I placed my left hand on his right shoulder.

"And what are we doing again?" he asked, quite startled.

"Dancing!" I beamed and started swaying. He went along with me with a confused look on his face.

"I guess I forgot that this is _the thing_ to do whenever you're at the ocean." He joked and I smiled. I didn't care if we sort of looked foolish because I was extremely happy.

"You know, I always had this fantasy. To waltz with someone at the ocean." I said matter-of-factly.

"Seriously?!"

"Yes." I lied. The truth was I never had that fantasy. I only thought about it a few moments ago.

"It's kind of weird without music though," I said. "In my fantasy, there was music."

"Nah." He said. "This is okay. The waves and the breeze will be our music."

"Aww." I made an exaggerated pout.

"That was too cheesy, I don't even want to remember I said it." He dead-panned and we laughed.

#

And then, it was raining. One minute you're having a moment with your boyfriend and the next second you're running towards the car 'cause it's pouring.

"Well, that was fun." He said while we sat at the car. We were parked in front of 7/11, a 10-minute drive from the ocean, and drinking hot chocolate.

"It was," I replied. "And then we'll catch a cold."

"You can't get sick; you'll have to be in Wonderland tomorrow."

And the nervousness suddenly came back. Ryoma probably noticed it because he added,

"Don't worry. You'll do great."

"I don't know. Will you be watching?" I sipped chocolate while looking at him.

"Of course, I have to admire the magnificent props." He shrugged. "Oh. And yeah, support my girlfriend."

I smiled. "Promise me you'll sit at the far corner in the back so that I can see you."

"Sure." He finished his choco.

"No, promise me!" I whined like a child.

"I promise." He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Good." I beamed contentedly.

Then, we sang more songs in the car while driving home. He dropped me off in front of my house and I kissed him on the cheek before I got out of the car. And we waved goodbye and I put the bottle on my bedside drawer thinking I'll try to get the paper out tomorrow. And I practiced my lines before I fell asleep.

Then, I did fall asleep and started dreaming of two pirates dancing waltz on the ocean.

#

"Good morning, Alice-chan!" Tomo-chan beamed when I got to the school auditorium. "You okay?"

She was acting quite jolly despite of the fact that I went off yesterday without her permission.

"I don't know." I said truthfully. "I think I could do it. I just don't know if I'll be convincing."

"Just do what you normally do at practice and we'll be fine." She said, handing me my costume.

"Where's Sakuno-chan?" I suddenly realized.

"She won't be here today." Tomo-chan scowled.

"Why?"

"They broke up, she's not feeling well."

My jaw dropped. "When did they break up? And…. WHY?"

"I don't know when. And I really don't know why. Let's cheer her up later, okay?" Tomo-chan helped me put on the costume.

"Yeah, let's go to her place later and cheer her up." I agreed. I suddenly felt like a rotten friend.

#

I found Ryoma under a tree, near the gym. He was holding his phone, and whatever he was reading made him scowl.

"Hey." I said, running to him. "I've been looking everywhere for you. It's about to start."

He turned his scowl into a smile when I got to him. "Oh, look at you with a cute ribbon on her hair."

"I look like a little kid. A little stupid kid in wonderland." I pouted.

"Well, someone's feeling great today." He laughed.

"I'm just… really nervous." I confessed.

"You'll do great."

"How do you know?"

"I just do." He shrugged.

He got something out of his pocket. It was a small box, wrapped in silver paper and with a gold ribbon. He grabbed my hand and placed the gift there.

"Oh. What's this?" I suddenly felt so giddy - and my heart was thumping faster than usual with surprise and excitement.

"You won't know until you open it." He said, but before he finished his sentence, I was already done ripping the paper. I opened the box inside and found something silver.

It was a necklace – with a message-in-a-bottle pendant. I'm not into jewelry and accessories, but because it was from him, I loved it immediately. And it was the best reminder of our trip yesterday.

"Aww." Was all I could say.

"Don't cry. It's just a necklace."

"It's not _just_ a necklace." And I almost _was_ crying.

"You're easily touched." He laughed and patted my head.

"Don't just pat my head!" And I hugged him. He just kept on laughing.

"You're kind of sweet." I said.

"Yeah, well, don't tell anyone. It's kind of a secret."

I punched his arm.

I had to leave because the play was about to start but I suddenly wasn't feeling nervous anymore – because I can't keep my mind off my new pendant and the happiness it sends all over my body.

#

I said a silent prayer before I went onto the stage. Everyone patted me on the back and wished for me to break a leg. The curtain opened and music started playing. I was on the stage. I was saying my lines.

There were lots of people but I kept my eyes fixed on the corner at the back of the room. Searching.

_Where is he?_ I kept on thinking. Because he was supposed to be there - but he wasn't.

The play went on chapter by chapter, one scene at a time. And my eyes kept going back to that corner. I was having this weird feeling but I couldn't quite place it.

And through it all until the play ended, until everyone finished congratulating me, until I got off my costume, until there were no audience left on the seats, I kept on thinking,

_**Where the heck is he?**_

#

Ryoma sighed and looked at his watch. It was almost dark.

_This should be the place. If it isn't, I'm going home. _He thought.

The breeze reminded him of yesterday at the ocean but he can't think of that – not now. But such is the strangeness of life that we are reminded more of the things we are trying the most not to remember.

Ryoma sighed again. He was not feeling well – in all aspects of his being. He took a deep breath, and then stepped forward.

He wished for her not to be there even though he was sure she was.

"So, you're just here." He told her, it was weird to have it sound like there was no emotion on his voice when he was, deep down, overflowing with different kinds of emotion.

"I knew you'd be the one who could find me." She said to him without looking at him. She was just sitting at the grass, looking at some flowers at her hand.

"Don't say that as if it means something. I just came here to get you home. Do you know what time it is?" Ryoma took a step closer. "Is that liquor? Since when did you start liking that? I thought you hated the smell."

"I want to stay here." She said, not looking at him.

"Well, that's not a good idea. How many bottles have you had?" he said as he bent over to pick up empty bottles – which reminded him of the pendant and Alice. He had no idea what to say to her tomorrow but he had to deal with the problem in front of him first.

"I want to stay."

"No. You have to get home. I won't wait around for you forever. If you don't stand up right now, I'll call..."

"Don't bother. He won't care."

Ryoma sighed again. He was losing his patience.

"I'm not even supposed to be here." He told her.

"Oh yeah. You're supposed to watch the play but you came for me."

Hearing that irritated Ryoma more.

"Again," he started "don't say it as if it means something."

"You came for me today. Why is that? Were you feeling guilty that you didn't come quickly the last time?"

"You are…" and he couldn't find the right word to describe her. "I'm going home." He snapped.

As he turned to leave, she grabbed his arm, "Don't go."

"Then get up and go home!" he yelled. It reminded him so much of a lot of fights they had before. He was always the first to lose patience.

"Stay."

"You can't say that-"

"Stay here with me."

And all of a sudden he felt like shouting – from the frustration and the anger and everything else in between. He clenched his jaw to keep calm.

"I don't even know why I came here because clearly this is a big mistake."

"We made lots of mistakes."

"You're drunk."

"I'm telling the truth." She stood up to face him. As she did, she swooned a bit. "You know, I've hated you since that day and I've always loved you too. Does that make sense?"

"No." he answered immediately. "But I've hated you too since then."

"And yet you're here for me right now."

"…"

"You were never good at lying, Ryoma." She told him.

"And you were great at it." He said before he could stop himself.

"I never lied to you. I mostly just lie to myself."

"So what kind of lies are you telling yourself now?"

"I'm telling myself… that I don't love you anymore…"

"…"

"… even when I know I do." She finished.

The wind blew and it made Ryoma feel really cold

"Sakuno…" Ryoma took his arm from her grasp, "That's the biggest fucking joke I've ever not laughed at."

#

"Have you seen Ryoma?" I asked my classmates as we got ready to go home. It would probably rain later because dark clouds were fast approaching so we had to go quickly – if I could just find him.

"No, haven't seen him all day." Horio-kun answered. "Why?"

"Nothing. He's also not picking up his phone. That guy…"

Horio laughed. "He's probably just busy doing something. Don't worry about him."

"Yeah, well. He promised he'd watch the play and that we'll eat sushi before going home but I guess I'll have to go without him. I'll just send him a message." I couldn't help but sigh.

_He broke his promise! He'll surely be sorry when I see him tomorrow._

I started walking while typing a message to tell him I'll be going ahead - when I bumped into someone.

"Oh sorry." We said in unison.

"Alice-chan!" he exclaimed.

"Momo-senpai? I thought you'd left for the States?" I was shocked.

"Yeah, but I'm here, huh? It's quite complicated. How was the play?" he smiled a forced smile.

"It went-"

"Listen, have you seen Sakuno?" He asked with intense urgency.

And I suddenly had this weird feeling.

"No, haven't seen her all day." I said automatically as I remembered Horio-kun saying the same thing to me. "Why? Is something wrong?"

Momo-senpai scratched his nape and said, "Well, not really. I just couldn't find her. And I really need to talk to her."

I looked at the message I was typing. The wind blew and it reminded me of the ocean. It made me feel really cold all of a sudden.

I was also suddenly terrified.


End file.
